The Nearest Star
by WhisperedSilvers
Summary: The quest for strength comes from the spirit or in this case, the soul.
1. constellation

**The Nearest Star**

 **By: WhisperedSilvers**

 **Prompt: "Part of me still believes you'll come back."**

 **Summary: The quest for strength comes from the spirit or in this case, the soul.**

—

* * *

 **constellation**

* * *

The dirt is wet beneath her feet, she can tell by the way it splatters on her calves and the way it drips down her knees. She's not sure if she's exhausted or if she's just looking for a way out. Whirlpool country is different terrain altogether, it's rocky with the remains of buildings and metal jaggedly pointing upwards. It's not hot because it lays on the same latitude as the Leaf village, though, it's humid.

"Sakura-chan," Naruto's voice crackles with a high-pitch against her earphones, she winces because _goddamn_ it's Naruto, and her fingers clumsily dial the knob down.

There's static and a crackle.

"Who gave the _dobe_ an amp?" Sasuke's sounds annoyed.

"Dickless, please refrain from screaming," Sai replies, a crackle of static follows, "We are under discretion, our objective must remain the utmost focus, you're feminine screeching is highly inappropriate."

Deciding to intervene _before_ Naruto begins to yell expletives and speak in such a Neanderthal, repulsive matter – her ear can't really take in any more noise – she sighs, "What is it Naruto?"

Crackle.

"Where are you?" Static. "We're regrouping at the big metal pointy stick stature," he pauses, "Thing."

She rolls her eyes and jumps over a particularly wobbly section of what looked like a shrine. It's a brick color, shale-like in texture, she could tell it used to pump chakra by the fibers of the threading. "I'm almost there," she pauses, "I found the scroll by the way."

Sasuke sounds confused, "What? Where?"

"A shrine by the water," Sakura frowns, "It was hanging on a piece of seaweed, it was the only place that wasn't destroyed. Didn't you guys scout the perimeter?"

It's silent for an entire minute.

"We didn't find any shrines," Sai answers her.

Sakura blinks slowly, even in the abandoned country, where her teammates could _not_ see a perfectly good shrine by the ocean, in the midst of the ruins—that _didn't_ make sense. There are no inhabitants of this ghost land, but it's not entirely improbable that _one_ building survived the destruction. Unless it's a genjutsu.

"Sasuke, do you see any chakra signatures? Anything at all?" Sakura asks quickly and she speeds up her pace, but then deliberately comes to a stop. She turns back and sends a pulse of chakra through the earth, just enough to touch the shrine. Even from far away, she sees the tip of the shrine transform back into rubble.

It makes her stomach tighten.

"No," He replies, "Did you send a chakra wave?"

"It was a genjutsu," She says, she doesn't like how this feels—it feels like it's a trap.

"How far are you?" Sai asks.

"Five thousand yards."

"We'll meet you half way," Naruto promises.

"Remind me," She starts, her pace picking up, "What does the scroll look like?"

"Blue, ruby embedded and black cotton thread on rice paper," Sai drones on, it sounds like he's reading the mission scroll, there is that sound of crinkling of paper before he zips back his pack.

Sakura glances at her scroll and yelps. There are _sapphires_ on this scroll, not rubies, so which scroll did she _take_? Trepidation fills her veins because she was so _sure_ that she picked the right scroll – why should there be more than one scroll? The country is abandoned! – underneath the archives of the shrine. Her voice feels like a swing, "Guys—I don't think this is the scroll," her voice cuts off into a squeak because there is water slamming through the air and she has to dig her elbows into the ground to dodge the swipe, "It's an ambush!"

How convenient.

Water jutsus in the Land of Whirlpool is just unfair. It's an island for heaven's sake! Sakura leaps into the trees to get a better vantage point of her enemy and much to her dismay, the jutsu comes from the ocean. It's a water dragon, but it's thinner and faster, "Earth Style: _Partition!_ "

Unfortunately, Sakura only knows a handful of elemental jutsus. The water dragon barely hits the earth wall, splatters of water coat few pink strands and the collar of her top. The earth disintegrates and she jumps back. The shinobi – two of them – they have masks, white as bone, but they are faceless and expressionless. At least ANBU has figures or animals, these shinobi lack any traits—it's depersonalized, and it's really, _really_ creepy. There are three of them, one with an ax and the other two are weapon-less.

Sakura tries to reason with herself. What could the scroll possibly entail – if that is, they want her scroll, the wrong scroll – or is it the scroll that the mission required? She isn't sure which one they are looking for and she isn't going to stick around to find out. She reaches for her kunai from her back pouch, threads them with explosive tags and scatters the metal. Then she runs, hopefully, she'll pick up Naruto or Sasuke or Sai's chakra signature.

The tags begin to detonate.

She hates running, it's the coward's way out and it doesn't make her feel any better about herself, but she _needs_ someone to watch her back.

"Sakura-chan!" Naruto's voice is godsent, he stops in front of her and she hears the sounds of her tags exploding, one by one.

"Naruto," She sounds tired, "Where are the rest?"

"Finishing the perimeter, we found two more nin on the outskirts, and the other three Sasuke handled."

Two plus three, plus another two equals seven.

Sakura's eyes widen, _seven_ nin? Whoever sent those nin, _really_ wants the scroll, that, or they want to make _sure_ they receive the scroll. Whatever's going on, it doesn't sound good. She presses her lips together before she explains quickly, "We need to lead them inland. They use high-ranking elemental ninjutsu, if they are too close to the water they are going to drown us."

They need to cut their resources off at the source.

It takes some of Naruto's goading and more explosive tags to have them just where they need them. Naruto takes the one with the ax, unsurprisingly, Sakura takes the other one and tries to flatten them with her strength. He's slimy, she grimaces, that much she'll give him, he uses chakra with his katana, which isn't abnormal, but it's different. It's elemental chakra he's using, but he's not using elemental ninjutsu which is _strange,_ because elemental chakra is required for elemental _ninjutsu._

It does not make sense.

He can apparently use lightning ninjutsu, he draws the lightning, bright like silver and uses the water trail from his previous jutsu as a conductor, but Sakura sees it too quickly and she destroys the earth with one chakra-infused blow. She uses his sudden blindness to fling a tree at him and then transforms a clone into a kunai. Using the wind like a whip, she flings her kunai, he dodges it obviously, but it transforms back into a clone and she damages his leg with her foot.

He _screams._

His voice rings in her ears, he inhales hard and uncaring, but he's too pissed to think of the consequences. Anger runs thick in his veins, he pulls out his katana and rakes the earth. Sakura is too confused to realize what he's doing, the ground disappears from her feet and she's flying through the air.

When Sakura looks up, she sees the scroll in front of her, unraveled and she winces. She sees the nin coming, limping, broken and he snarls at her through his bone mask and she _hears_ it. She's healing herself unconsciously, that much she's aware of, but healing takes time so Sakura makes a desperate grab for the scroll – even if it's not her mission objective, she would be _damned_ to give this bastard his glory – her fingers wet with her own blood, grabs the blue, sapphire embedded, black cotton, rice paper scroll and now, it's a little fuzzy.

And then she can't see.

It takes her teammates ten minutes to find her. They found the scroll apparently, it was hidden in the handle of that big ax, but here, they stand in the forest not fully understanding the situation, because to the rest of the team, Sakura looks completely fine. She has some dried blood on her fingers, but she lays on the ground as if she's stuck to the earth itself and it's really, _really_ weird. Her eyes are blank, her pupil shrinks to the point where it looks like a small ink dot, and her eyes are so _green._

The unraveled scroll in front of her is blank and the other nin—masked nin or whatever the hell he was, he's disintegrated into what looks like _sand._ And it's really, _really_ weird.

"Sakura-chan?" Naruto's hesitant when he calls her, crouching low his hand touches her upper back carefully, "Are you okay?"

"Naruto?" Her voice sounds faint, even to his ears.

Naruto glances up at Sasuke and Sai who look more confused than worried or as close to concerned as they can look. He pats her on the back, "Yeah?"

"I can't see."

He blinks, "What? Your eyes are wide open."

She tries again, "Naruto," she pauses to emphasize her hysteria, "I can't _see._ "

"Oh," He breathes shakily, his other two teammates stiffen as the weight of her words hits them, "Oh."

Then it's a race back to Konoha.

Sakura is blind for twenty-four hours, which to her sounds reasonable, but what is irritatingly confusing is that she doesn't know _how_ or _why_ she went from vision, to no vision, to vision again—medically, it's impossible, because there was no damage to her head – at least she doesn't think so – or her eyes.

But then Tsunade explains that scroll that had unraveled during the mission contained chakra.

Now, _that,_ that makes sense.

Rapid chakra absorption can cause sudden blindness, the chakra pathways are consumed with a high volume of energy and that energy is raw, meaning that it hasn't been converted into chakra that's usable. It's like being shocked. Sensors, certain bloodlines and other types of nin that can use chakra just by touching another person is different, their DNA is programmed with an enzyme that immediately breaks down the energy into useable chakra.

People like Sakura, who come from a civilian based family, with no bloodline limit or anything remotely abnormal— is not born with that enzyme. She's someone who is extremely sensitive to chakra, to have her overloaded with raw, natural energy caused her body to go into shock, thus forcing her body to compromise her optical nerves for the time being.

Tsunade does not have that much information to give her, instead, she tells her to rest a little more while she goes to the archives and tries to find something.

But Sakura is tired, so she sleeps some more.

The next morning, she feels like her shoulders are heavy, like the weight of the world rests on her fine shoulder bones and she's just miserable. She feels almost like she's hardwired on caffeine, her body feels jittery, like she has to train or do something remotely active. Her brain isn't working as fast as her body, so when she leaps out of the bed, she leaps to high and suddenly she's on the ceiling.

"Um, Sakura-chan," Naruto pops in from the hospital door, he looks at her strangely, "Why are you on the ceiling?"

"Um," She pauses not sure how to answer him, she hops back down, slowly almost as if she's testing her own reflexes, "I don't know. I feel like I have to train or something. I think I slept too much."

"You have too much energy?" Sai asks from the window, he stares at her, "How convenient."

"What Sai means is," The blonde rolls his eyes, "Baa-chan just discharged you from the hospital. You have to be careful."

Sakura grumbles and warns him, "I'm the med-nin, Naruto."

"Like that means anything," Sasuke snorts, his body lays against the doorframe, "You don't listen to your own advice."

"Shut up, Sasuke," She frowns and then crosses her arms over her chest, "I clearly remember someone snapping their femur two weeks ago and ran out of the hospital before receiving his pain meds."

Naruto snickers, "You're even worse than sensei, bastard."

Sasuke scowls.

"Besides," Sakura scratches her shoulder, "It was just chakra overflow. Ironic how it's not exhaustion."

It's quiet for a few moments and Naruto who is uncomfortable with the silence, asks no one in particular, "So, ramen then?"

—

Sakura ditches the ramen for tempura. Her walk back home, with her three bickering teammates behind her, is surprisingly uneventful, she was sure that Ino would ambush her, but she shrugs that thought off when Naruto whines, "Sakura-chan, we totally should've got ramen. They have a special on pork ramen."

"Too much salt will give you hypertension,"

"I would willingly die if I don't eat ramen again,"

"Really?" Sasuke makes a sound of interest.

She rolls her eyes and she hears a faint sound, something that sounds like a chuckle.

Her apartment complex is surprisingly modern because it's the shinobi part of the village, clans tend to stick with traditional housing and furniture. Modern housing is usually reserved in the civilian part of the village, where things were to more of their convenience whereas clans and ninja families tend to keep things a little less complicated.

"Alright, now go away," Sakura tells them as she opens the door of her apartment, her landlord passes the halls and smiles at her before disappearing down the stairs.

"But Sakura-chan—"

"Away," She's firm, but she has to snicker when Sai looks at her with what looked like a trying pout, she has to remember, he's _trying_ , but it's really, _really_ —

"You look like a blowfish, Sai."

Even Sasuke snorts.

"Away. Now," Sakura repeats, slipping off her boots, and then she sighs forcefully with exasperation, "Ino will be here in maybe an hour to ambush me, I would like to gain some sanity before she arrives," she pushes them out of her doorframe, "Go. I've had enough of you morons for one day."

All she wants is some peace and _quiet._

There's a faint thought of storing her excess chakra into her Yin seal, but it disappears the moment Sai says something rather colorful.

"We'll come back with dinner, Sakura-chan!" Naruto's voice is muffled, but she can't help but smile. They mean well and she loves them, but sometimes they're just too _much_.

Tossing her pack on her couch, she walks into her bedroom and rummages her draws for something comfortable to wear. As much as she likes wearing her standard shinobi outfit, she really isn't in the mood to shave her legs. Pulling out a big sweater that nearly swallows her whole, she turns to her full-length mirror and unzips her red shirt. Her bindings are the only thing that's left that is covering her chest, her skirt and tights still on her bottom. When she turns her vision back to the mirror, there's a familiar man staring right back at her.

She blinks.

The blonde does not move, but he blinks too.

Sakura is still staring at the mirror and she's not sure what's happening, because she's pretty sure that blonde is dead, but he's still staring at her and she turns around slowly. There's nothing there—she looks like she's staring into blank space, so she turns back and he's still _there._

Sakura is still staring, because she's half-fucking _naked_ and there is a man in her _mirror._

She thinks she's taking this surprisingly well. Sakura is a medic, her first intuition is to think and then act. Identify the problem, understand the symptoms and then act, because stranger things have _happened._

The man in the mirror looks like he's behind her, his reflection, like he's standing a few feet from her bare back and he looks like he's in her _room_ , but when she turns he's not there and it's just—?

"Um," Sakura breathes, if she moves to the left, she wonders if he'll disappear because her back will cover his right side of his shoulder and if it doesn't cover his shoulder—then he's in her mirror, but the question is, what if it _does_ cover?

She moves and his shoulder is concealed.

She feels like she's been stabbed— _again._

"Holy shit," Sakura swears so roughly that the man in the mirror flinches.

 _Minato Namikaze_ is in her _room._

The infamous _Yellow Flash_ , Naruto's father, the Fourth Hokage—the very _dead_ Fourth Hokage is in her _bedroom._

Sakura has effectively identified the problem, but there is no solution, so she believes, hysterically, that she is indeed, allowed to freak out.

—

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* * *

 _Cough._

Feedback is appreciated.


	2. jupiter

**The Nearest Star**

 **By: WhisperedSilvers**

 **Prompt: "Part of me still believes you'll come back."**

 **Summary: The quest for strength comes from the spirit or in this case, the soul.**

 **X**

* * *

 **jupiter**

* * *

There are three things that keep Sakura's rapidly firing neurons occupied, but the number one thing on her list is that she is completely, wholly, entirely, _one hundred percent_ certain that Minato Namikaze is staring at her through her mirror, and because, she is so _sure_ that it is in fact, Minato Namikaze _staring at her_ through her mirror—she turns to face her bed and tries to deny it.

"Okay," Sakura nods to herself, not wanting to turn back to look at her mirror, "Okay. I'm going insane. It's the only explanation," she attempts to be plausible, "Yes, he is in my mirror because I hit my head _really hard_ on our last mission."

She can't remember if she actually _did_ hit her head.

Sakura turns back to look at her mirror and the Fourth stares right back at her, she's not sure if he's amused or if he's in shock.

She tries to think and breathes, "What the _hell_?"

Sakura pokes her mirror and she's thankful when she hits cold glass instead of warm skin, or would it be cold skin, since he's kind of…dead. She tries to rationalize, "Okay, okay—I'm _fine._ I'm—"

She loses her cool and throws a fist at her mirror.

The image of him and her in her bedroom disappears, glass shards scattering over the floor, cutting her skin and she hisses at the blood. At least she's not _looking_ at him. That has to count for something. Sighing at her hissy fit, she cleans up the glass and walks into the bathroom determined to clean her cut—band-aids would have to do for now, she needs something to hold her down to reality.

Sakura bandages the three cuts on her ankle and one near her left toe. She looks back up, her face staring at the mirror of her sink and she sees him, _again._

" _What—?_ "

"Wait!" He _speaks,_ "Wait, don't break the mirror!" Minato's voice strains with tension, he raises his hands into a defensive position.

Sakura blinks slowly, her brain processes the scene slowly and she utters with disbelief lacing her tone, "I can _hear_ you."

Minato looks visibly relieved, his shoulders hunch over the mirror and he smiles sheepishly, "Yes. I guess you can."

She stares at the mirror and then, uncharacteristically, she pleads with him, " _Please_ tell me you're real and that I'm not going crazy."

He looks stunned at her desperation because even _he_ cannot comprehend—

"But if you aren't real and this is just my mind screwing with me, how can I tell if _I'm_ crazy?" Sakura speaks to herself, as if Minato's not even _there,_ and she speaks with a certain high pedigree of medical jargon that his mind spinning.

"Wait—wait," He tries to calm her down, "The scroll. It's the _scroll_."

The relief that floods Sakura's body is bone-heavy, it weighs her down like buckets of water and Minato can feel the pull of tension. She sighs, "Oh thank God. This isn't a genjutsu, so you might _actually_ be real."

"How do you know this isn't a genjutsu?" Minato asks despite himself, he needs her to believe him, but he's also just really curious.

"There isn't any disruption or haziness in my chakra."

"You don't need to feel anything to be under a genjutsu."

Sakura stares at him with a certain light and straightens her shoulders, "I'm chakra _sensitive._ "

And maybe that's all the answer he needs.

"I can prove that I'm real," Minato points out quickly, he wants to give her as much confirmation as possible, so she doesn't break the mirror—the only way for her to see him apparently.

Sakura looks at him warily, her hands press against her bathroom vanity, and then tightens against the dip. "How?"

There's a phantom sensation, like fingers tracing her knuckles, the shivery sensation is cold, but then it becomes heavier like something is loosely grasping her wrist. Two heartbeats pass and then she feels his hand _squeeze._

Green eyes widen and she flinches back, "You are _real_."

Sakura's brain can't exactly wrap around the concept that the _dead_ Fourth Hokage is speaking to her in her bathroom, but after the entire war, it's crazy enough to be _plausible._ Rummaging in her cabinet, she finds a makeup compact – it didn't a genius to put two and two together to come up with four – and leaves her bathroom.

She tugs on her sweater over her head – God she was in her _bindings_ talking to the Fourth! Her etiquette was worse than _Naruto's_ – and she tries to make herself small when she shoves off her skirt and tights, but she keeps her bindings on because, _because_.

Sakura takes a seat on her bed and opens up her compact mirror.

Minato blinks when the dim light of her bedroom lamp flickers through the room, he turns to face her and she's very aware of how young he is, he remarks with surprise, "You're very…intuitive, aren't you?"

Sakura grimaces obviously not knowing how to respond to such a comment, she stacks her pillows on top of each other and places the mirror on the top. She would like to have a face-to-face conversation with the supposed dead Fourth Hokage and holding him in her hands is just not appropriate. Her way of speaking – thanks to her mentor – is rather blunt, so she tries to soften her blow with a look of confusion, "What's going on, Hokage-sama?"

"The scroll you opened was from Whirlpool, correct?"

She nods in confirmation.

Minato sighs, he's wearing the standard Jounin vest and a dark blue sleeve underneath that, but other than that, he looks relatively casual, "It was a failsafe I had left in case the Nine-Tails was released again. Naruto's seal can only be replaced once."

Sakura's eyes widen, "But, Naruto can unseal and seal Kurama."

His eyebrows raise at that, but he looks at her and something _clicks_ , "You are…Sakura, right? I remember seeing you during the war."

She nods again surprised that he could place her during that time, she corrects him, "Sakura Haruno. Naruto's teammate."

Minato smiles, he's thankful that he landed in capable hands. He explains, "This scroll was created in case Naruto couldn't control the Kyuubi. The scroll was passed down from the Third and then to Tsunade-sama. I couldn't take any chances, even if I were dead. My chakra was infused into the scroll, a little less than half of the Yin chakra, once the seal was activated – by blood – the chakra would attach to the body and form a clockwise seal. The seal would then push the demonic chakra into his prison and seal away the Kyuubi."

"But," Sakura starts, she absorbs the information, "I'm a counter-clockwise type, so my chakra would not be mix with yours so easily," She frowns and then explains, "The scroll was opened by accident. Our mission was to obtain a different scroll in Whirlpool, it was only by coincidence that I picked up this scroll instead. If the seal was supposed to suppress demonic chakra, then what did the seal do to me?"

Minato took a long while to answer, "My guess is that you overloaded your system with chakra. You've been trying to store the extra chakra in your Yin seal, haven't you."

It's a statement, not a question.

"Yes," She confirms his conclusion, "I've been doing it since I left the hospital," She grimaces again, "But your chakra is raw, I have to convert it and it takes longer for my body to heal when it comes to foreign substances. I don't come from a shinobi family or clan or have any sort of bloodline, my chakra system was overwhelmed. It should be almost finished I think."

Minato stares at her, "It is."

She doesn't understand, but then he swipes the corners of his eyes and then, with hesitation, she reaches up to touch her eyelids, her fingers swipe to the end corners of her eyes – the part just where eyeliner would end – she feels the slight abrasion of skin. She blinks and then she grabs her contact and shifts the mirror over the light.

Minato is startled when her face suddenly appears in front of him and he's very aware of how _green_ her eyes are.

There are two triangles, one each side and they are sideways, with the pointy side pointing her irises and the base facing her ears. They are very tiny triangles, half the size of a grain of rice, but what is truly strange is that they are the same color as Minato's eyes.

"I suppose it could be worse," Sakura grumbles at her new appearance, she's vain and she knows it, "I could look like Jiraiya-sama."

Minato knows better than to laugh, but still, he does manage to breathe a chuckle.

"Hokage-sama," She addresses him curiously, her fingers place the compact back onto her pillow stack, "How is it that you are in the mirror?"

"I'm actually not in the mirror."

Sakura stares at him.

"You can only see my reflection from the mirror," Minato explains, he scratches the back of his neck in a sheepish manner, "I'm actually sitting right next to you."

Sakura snaps her neck to the left and ignores the sting of her tendons. There's no one next to her. She swipes her hand wondering if she could feel something, rather than empty space, but the air hums unperturbed.

"For some reason, you can only see me in the mirror," He continues, spider-silk tickles her fingers, "I haven't fully figured out how to make myself visible, I think because our chakras haven't fused properly we're all out of sync."

Sakura ponders on that, her finger touches her chin and then she responds, "That makes sense. Chakra is a life force, after all, if there's some sort of imbalance or blockage, obviously some parts of the jutsu or seal or whatever the hell this is, won't work. Our chakras won't merge properly because of our affinity types."

Minato looks at her with surprise, "That's a plausible statement."

Sakura tries not to bristle, she's not an _idiot,_ she flicks her hair to her shoulders and huffs dryly, "Other than my chakra being counter-clockwise, mixing would be harder, but merging would be even more difficult."

The Fourth Hokage smiles nervously, he's not sure how to approach the irritated female and then he poses his question, intent on using it as a diversion towards her ire, "What is your affinity?"

"Water and earth," She answers and then grimaces, "I don't really use elemental ninjutsu, so it's probably not all that important."

"I have fire, wind and lightning affinities," Minato reveals and inwardly groans. This would be harder than he thought, their chakras aren't compatible, the only thing that's binding them together is their Yin chakra, but something she said struck a chord with him, "You don't use elemental ninjutsu?"

"No," Sakura replies swiftly and then she asks, because if his chakra could lock a prison within her, then perhaps—she speaks aloud, "Is it possible that the seal that you were going to use for Kurama – because there's no demon in me obviously – I mean," It's hard enough trying to explain this, "Is it possible because I'm not a _vessel_ —" Sakura stops abruptly and then she blinks.

 _Oh shit._

Inner Sakura disappeared as soon as she hit fifteen, but would that be considered a vessel? She's more of a disassociative personality, she's harmless – she bites the inside of her cheek – at least she _thinks_ she's harmless, but Inner Sakura always had a mind of her own and her own feelings. But suppose Inner Sakura is still living inside her, just dormant and if the Fourth sealed her…wouldn't she become _his_ vessel? Or something similar to that? Is that why he didn't disappear? Like he's supposed to?

"—kura. Sakura!" Minato's phantom hands trail up her arms and locks onto her shoulder bones. He doesn't shake her how Naruto would shake her or how Kakashi would, his fingers press deep into the bone something akin to acupuncture and it's a light jostle he gives, almost as if he's holding a piece of glass.

"Huh?" She blinks hazy green eyes and then shakes her head. She wants to slap herself and remind her brain that she has to be _logical,_ she continues as if she just didn't have an extensional crisis, "Right—I was talking about the seal, because I don't possess another being in me," she pauses thinking to Inner, "Is it possible that the seal, sealed you to me?"

Minato watches her suspiciously, he saw her form tense when she said the word _vessel,_ but he could not sense anything abnormal from her, so either she's lying or she is truly uncomfortable of being a vessel or it's something different altogether. He considers her question with a pensive face, "It's conceivable because you're not a vessel, the seal might reverse and suck me into you."

Sakura swallows at the innuendo in his words, she pushes back her embarrassment because she is _twenty-one_ and she's been talking to Ino a _little_ too much lately, she points out, "We aren't exactly fused properly, since you're…attached to me," she inhales, "My chakra is unstable and I have to find a way to unseal you, because chakra is all that I _have_."

Sakura feels vulnerable and that scares her more than anything.

.

.

.

"Sakura-chan!" Naruto's voice is like a beacon against her front door and she mumbles incoherently into her pillows. All she wants to do is _sleep,_ it's her day _off_ and _why?_

"Has he always been this…eccentric?" Minato asks more with amusement than exasperation.

Sakura left her compact mirror open, just in case. He sat on her nightstand next to her clock and she twists in the sheets, trying to ignore the pounding of the door, she curses darkly, "I swear I'm going to _kill_ him."

The door unlocks and suddenly the sheets of her bed have left her body. She shivers at the cool wind and turns over to glare at the blonde. He has the _nerve_ to look sheepish, and then she scowls, "You have three seconds to explain yourself or you are going through the _wall._ "

"We have training!" Naruto reminds her childishly, "I'm sorry I forgot about dinner last night, but Kakashi-sensei is back, he said to meet us at the bridge."

"When is Kakashi-sensei _ever_ on time?" She growls and sits up.

Naruto has to admit, she does have a point and then he laughs sheepishly, "We can get breakfast! Ramen—"

"I am _not_ eating ramen for breakfast."

He pouts, "Sai said that there's a teashop near the hospital," He tries to persuade her and she has to admit, grudgingly, that it's working, and then he says brightly, "They have dango."

Sakura curses her softness for Naruto, she grunts, "Fine. Get out, so I can change."

"Kakashi is your teacher?" Minato asks jovially and laughs at the irony.

Sakura snaps her head to look at him in disbelief. Is _this_ how he's going to tell Naruto—

"—your makeup-thing open? That's so weird," Naruto frowns and lifts up the mirror, "Sakura-chan, you're pretty enough. You know you don't need makeup."

Sakura stares at him dubiously and then she glances at Minato in the mirror. She asks slowly, "What are you looking at in the mirror?"

Naruto frowns at the strange questions, "What are you talking about? I'm looking at myself and this weird powder thing."

Sakura takes back her mirror and she looks at Minato with shock.

 _Naruto can't see Minato._

If Naruto, can't see his father or hear him, despite having a piece of his chakra still in him, then that means, only _she_ can see Minato.

—

Sakura chews her dango stick with a thoughtful look on her face, she's debating whether or not to tell her team about Minato's abrupt appearance, as if her life isn't complicated enough. Is it worth the scrutiny? She doesn't know how—how different Naruto would treat her, but furthermore, she'd be locked down in T&I as a threat or a mentally unstable patient, or perhaps diagnosed with PTSD, she didn't exactly have _proof_ that Minato is, well, bound to her.

She glances at her tea with a sudden darkness, Minato stares at her with the same thoughtful expression on her face. When Naruto went to find Sasuke, Sai left to pay for the rest of breakfast and explains that he has to run an errand for the Hokage—ANBU stuff apparently.

"I can't drink my tea knowing you're in it," Sakura says to her tea cup.

Minato frowns and disappears.

Sakura blinks in disbelief, " _What_ —?"

"Over here," Minato's face appears in the syrup of her empty dango sticks.

"How did you—" Sakura shakes her head, suddenly exasperated, "You know, I don't _want_ to know."

"I believe anything with a reflection should allow me to be visible," He finishes, "To you."

"Convenient," She mumbles and sips her cold tea and then she speaks her thoughts aloud, "You do know I'm not going to tell anyone about you, right?"

Minato nods, blue eyes tired, "Yes."

She raises a brow, "You're not going to try and persuade me?"

He smiles and shakes his head, "No. You understand the consequences of this situation and discretion should be key if someone should learn about your _involvement_ with one of the Hokages—"

Sakura's not sure if the Hokage's being suggestive on purpose, but if he is, then—then. Then she doesn't know what to do.

"—lead to you being a target, a much higher value target considering that there were rouge ninja after my scroll in Whirlpool. I'm not sure how much T&I has changed since I was last here but considering what has happened within the past decade, I can assume it's gotten much harsher," His voice is kind, but his eyes has a certain intensity that Naruto could never have, "I would not want to subject you to that, Sakura."

Sakura isn't sure how to feel about him – the Fourth Hokage – he's nice, genuine, kind and a lot more determined than most of the shinobi she's used to. She could see where Naruto's determination comes from, but it's hard to remain level-headed in a situation like this, hell, she's having a hard time separating herself from running and screaming – which would prove more of a movie-like scenario – she hates that she can't feel like herself, because he's around and just _watching_ her. It's like she has to be on her guard all the time and frankly, it's only been a day, and she's already exhausted.

"Hokage-sama," She begins wanting to try and understand something a little more, "I don't—"

"Minato," He interrupts her with a warm voice.

She blinks and then stares at her plate, "Excuse me?"

"My name is Minato Namikaze."

Sakura still doesn't understand and she frowns, "Yes, I know what your name is."

He still looks at her with that ocean-blood intensity, he punctuates his sentence as if he's speaking to a child, " _Use_ it."

 _Oh._

"Don't you think that's inappropriate?" Sakura exclaims with wide eyes, she's not sure what exactly is going through his mind and she doesn't _want_ to know, but she still tells him in a whisper, "You're the _Fourth Hokage_ , shouldn't I address you as such—"

 _Not to mention Naruto's father._

"But I'm not the Hokage anymore, am I?" Minato interjects not unkindly, his tilts his head in a very Kakashi-like gesture, "I lost that title when I died. Please, I would prefer some shred of normalcy."

Sakura almost glares at him.

 _He_ wants normalcy? What about _her?_ What about the girl who has legends for teammates, who has a Hokage for a sensei, who has dealt with more abandonment than she has ever asked for? When will _she_ catch a break?

"Minato-sama—"

" _Sakura_ ," He breathes with frustration, her name is all emphasis and heat, like something straight of the fire, the Fourth Hokage was never known to hold a temper, but given the situation, he relays her name as if she's his salvation.

"Minato," She can't help but roll her eyes, a weight drops into her stomach, it coils like a living thing and it makes her slightly uncomfortable, but exhilarated when she speaks to him, and she actually forgets what she's supposed to tell him, "We are leaving."

Because if she stays any longer, she's sure that she would've provoked an argument, and arguing with Minato Namikaze is a little more than daunting.

Even if he is dead.

The walk to _the bridge_ – she says it like that because it's just a staple to her. Iconic, if Naruto is to comment on it, but legendary to everyone else. It's kind of ridiculous – it's a ten-minute walk, thankfully there are no reflective surfaces for Minato to pop up possibly giving her a heart attack when she isn't looking – that people think this way.

"Sakura-chan!" Naruto greets with a wave as if he did not see her this morning, he leans against the bridge and Sasuke looks up. "Did you bring back any dango?"

"Of course not," She huffs, "After that wake-up call, do you really think I'm going to bring you a _treat_."

"Naruto you should know better," Kakashi appears in a cloud of white smoke, his Hokage robes still pristine against his shinobi gear, "Sakura-chan likes her beauty sleep."

Sakura glances at the water underneath the bridge, she has to swallow a laugh at the look of disbelief on Minato's face. He asks her with incredulity lacing his tone, "Kakashi's _Hokage_?"

Sakura inclines her head and then turns to face her teacher, "I'm going to pretend I didn't hear that, sensei."

"Why not?" Sai frowns.

Sasuke sighs.

"Alright kiddies," The group twitches at the name, "I thought it would be a nice day since my week in Mist with bickering politicians and even greedier Daimyos to teach my team, hm?"

"And what exactly are you going to teach us?" Sasuke drones because despite them not saying it, the four of them are in their early twenties and perhaps their sensei is well _old._

Kakashi's eye crinkles and then he replies with an exaggerated amount of cheeriness, "Why, teamwork Sasuke."

Sakura sighs louder than Sasuke and she frowns, "Sensei, really. What's going on?"

"Sakura-chan," The Hokage says her name like a song, fluid and knowing, "You were always my favorite student," he ignores Naruto's yell of disbelief, Sasuke's raised brow and Sakura's snort, "The four of you will become my Hokage Guard Platoon."

There are a few moments of stunned silence.

"You're joking," Sakura blinks, "Sensei, we have to be ANBU to be a part of your platoon."

"I know," He winks.

Sakura takes a few steps back in suspicion.

"You want us to take the ANBU exams," Sasuke states quietly, he looks over at Naruto who's just as shocked.

"But I'm already ANBU," Sai says slowly.

"That's right Sai," The Hokage nods at him and then claps his hands, "All I have to do is reinstate you, as for the rest of you children," he makes a line with his pointer finger, "You have some training to do, even though you three were given a field promotion – even though Sakura-chan's the only one who properly became Jounin – you still have a lot to learn to take the ANBU exams," he looks tired as he finishes, "A war can only do so much for growth. There's still a lot more you have to learn and if you want to become Hokage Naruto," he looks at him seriously, "You have to do it properly."

Naruto stares at him.

"Realistically," Kakashi turns his head to face his only female student, "Sakura-chan is the best candidate to be Hokage."

Naruto feels like he's been slapped, his fists clench, "What? Why?"

Sakura flinches at the sudden animosity, she doesn't know what Kakashi is trying to do, but she does _not_ like it. There's a power shift in the group, Sai soon realizes. Sakura's earned her Jounin status, she went through the system, she's been in the war, she's done everything correctly and—

"Sakura is the Fifth's apprentice, she's succeeded Tsunade-sama, she's the world's best medical ninja, she's been the Hokage's assistant for nearly six years, she was an advisor to Shikamaru during the war, she's the director of her _own_ hospital, she's an ambassador to Suna and she has more field experience than all of you," Kakashi explains, "Sakura is technically a far better candidate than you. If you want to be Hokage, Naruto, you have to be serious."

Sakura has always dreamt of recognition, especially from her team, but the way Kakashi praises her and the way her team looks at her—she just doesn't _want_ it.

And it's ironic too because it makes her feel even worse.

Sakura nearly flinches when she feels spider-silk caress the back of her neck and God _help_ her, she doesn't know what to do. She doesn't look at Naruto, but she glares at Kakashi because he's antagonizing Naruto on _purpose_ and for what reason, she doesn't know.

"With that said and done," Kakashi crinkles his eye again, "Let's start sparring so I can gauge your abilities," he pauses and clarifies, "Abilities only. That means no sharingan, no rinnegan, no Kurama, no kekkai genkai and am I missing something?"

Sakura wants to slam her head into a tree.

"Just the basic three: ninjutsu, genjutsu, and taijutsu," Kakashi then pauses, "And kenjutsu."

She couldn't fault him, Kakashi basically stripped her teammates of their power-ups, now they were just like her, and that has to be good enough for now, and to her surprise, it's Sasuke that _complains,_ "And Sakura gets to keep her super-strength and medical skills?"

Kakashi smiles behind that stupid mask of his, "Sakura's super-strength is actually chakra control, it's not even part of the basic three and it's medical _ninjutsu_."

The three of them stare at her with incredulity.

At least Kakashi is realizing that she made _herself_ into a shinobi with no special blood or power-ups. She's worked from scratch, with her bare knuckles and raw intelligence—that is what sets her apart from her teammates.

"Sakura fights primarily close-combat, so she will spar with Sai because he's a long distance fighter," He instructs, "Sasuke with Naruto."

"How should we spar?" Naruto finally speaks.

Kakashi thinks for a moment and then he replies just as casually, "Until you pass out."

Sasuke's eyes widen fractionally.

 _It's an all-out spar._

And Kakashi never condones these types of training exercises, so he _really_ must be serious.

Sakura slips on her training gloves, she tightens them over her wrists, glances at her kunai and Minato's face flashes. She turns to look at Sai, not even bothering to sense where Sasuke and Naruto's battle is taking place. She asks with hesitation, "Ready?"

Sai nods, "Please don't make me go to the hospital after."

She laughs despite herself, "I'll think about it."

Sakura stares at him for a few seconds and then she disappears.

—

Sai has to admit, Sakura has improved a great deal since the war. She's gotten faster, much faster, fast enough that _Sasuke_ has to use the second level of his sharingan to keep up with her. Sakura's training is mostly built on her hiding and healing, not on the front lines and the only time she's on the front lines is when she uses that Yin seal of her's. Her fists get stronger every day, she's using less and less chakra to destroy something and that's scary by itself.

Being able to destroy the earth with her bare hands, is enough to keep him on his toes, especially since she began studying earth ninjutsu, combining that with her raw strength made him cautious of staying on the ground, but she's only picked up a few, or so he's heard.

Her hospital work keeps her busy.

He understands what Kakashi is doing with the separation tactics. ANBU squads do rely on teamwork tactics, at least a handful of times, but they are mostly a one man-team, meaning that they must learn to work independently. When ANBU shinobi wear those masks, they are stripped of their identity, they are de-individualized and de-personified, they function with the sole purpose of serving Konoha and if they should die, they die under the pretense of being _just_ a body.

It's a cruel evil, but it's necessary and Sai's spent months trying to break out of that mental state. It's easier for him now, to switch in and out of those masks, but he doesn't know how the rest of his team will handle the drastic change in protocol and dynamics.

When Sakura grabs his ankle from underneath, he gasps and substitutes himself with a log before she could yank him down, but she anticipated that move, the earth swirls around her hand and tangles around his foot and she _swings_ him into the trees. She appears suddenly above the earth and she rushes him because she doesn't want him to have the advantage.

She charges at him with chakra in her fist, but Sai's already drawing a tiger with a broken arm.

The tiger roars and jumps at her, she barely has enough time to pull back and land a fist into ink, but then Sai's on a bird and she's earth-bound. His figures are pre-drawn and now he's summoning them like the sky is falling.

When Sakura is promptly overwhelmed with her surroundings scattered with animals, Sai takes his time to draw a dragon and Sakura isn't quite fast enough to dodge it's blow when he says release.

The dragon hits her with a wet _clack_ , she's sent tumbling into the trees and as much as she uses chakra to soften the blow, she's way too disorientated to realize how much unsealed chakra she's using – her chakra is already unstable because of the seal so she's using more chakra than she really needs – only when her reserves are scraped raw does it hit her—

—and Minato _hits_ her.

The sky is falling, she thinks, because it rains ink and the clouds are white.

She blanks out.

Sakura comes around to the feeling of something warm touching her, it's not physically touching her, but it's _touching_ her. She's only been out for a few minutes, that's what she hears Sai telling Sasuke—? Or is it Naruto? She doesn't want to open her eyes, so she thinks and she thinks.

The grass is cool beneath her skin, her fingerless gloves are brushing the blades and the sun feels warm. She thinks it's the sun, but it smells like the ocean, except she isn't near the ocean and she's drifting in the comforting darkness of her mind.

 _Sakura,_ Minato's voice is warm too, _Our chakra's merged. Can you hear me?_

Sakura's eyes snap open and she's so dizzy that she nearly falls back down if it isn't for Sasuke.

"What?" She stutters.

Sai glances at the Hokage in concern and Kakashi leans down to ask her gently, "Sakura do you remember what happened?"

Sakura blinks.

 _My head is killing me._

 _I can try and suppress it_ , Minato replies gently, _but I don't know how long I can hold it._

She's startled and tries to look for a reflective surface, but she doesn't have to because Minato is in front of her leaning against the tree and he presses his finger against his mouth.

She's really trying hard to _not_ scream right now because now he's _visible._

So she calls out, uncertainly, in her mind, _Minato, is there a reason I can see you or hear you for that matter?_

Minato's voice is like the sun on a rainy day, _When your chakra reserves dropped, our Yin seal activated and pushed chakra into you. My chakra is now fully merged with yours, so you can hear and see me._

"Sai pushed me into the trees, didn't he?" Sakura said flatly, she brought a green hand to the back of her head and removed the strain, _I need you to stop whatever you're doing so I can heal._

The ache comes back with full force, but it cools into a throbbing sensation when she finishes.

"Sorry about that, Ugly," Sai smiles sheepishly, "You almost killed me."

Sakura could feel shock and aghast radiate from Minato – she's really going to have to sit down for _that_ talk – _U_ _gly?_

"You had a sealed scroll," Sakura points out, "That's cheating."

"That's right," Kakashi makes a sound of disappointment and whacks Sai over the head with his book. Sasuke eventually releases Sakura so she can stand and moves over to set Sai's arm in place. The Hokage then looks at the tower and almost groans, "Well, I have duties to attend to, but come back later for an assessment."

And then he disappears, but so does Sakura.

.

.

.

"So, let me get this straight," Sakura paces in her room as Minato sits on her bed watching her with ocean-intense eyes and a small quirk of his lips, "Now that I've tapped into my Yin seal, our chakras have fully merged – because we both are compatible with Yin chakra and that was the only thing binding us – so now, you can hear my thoughts, I can see you, and you can feel what I can feel and I can feel what you can feel?"

Her explanation is warbled, it's missing words and it's a little confusing, but it's expected.

Minato takes a moment to think, "And I can touch you."

Sakura walks over, tries to place her hand on his very fluffy hair and she doesn't hide her sigh when her hand slides right through him. Minato laughs a little, grabs her hand to test the connection and she's _shaken_ because now, he _feels_ real.

He feels warm, almost human and she feels _guilty_ because now he's _bound_ to her.

Minato pauses as he intakes her new emotions, her thoughts and then he presses his lips together, "Sakura. It's _not_ your fault."

But yes, it _is._ If she had read the mission scroll carefully – because she's _always_ fucking careful – then she wouldn't have unsealed the scroll and bind him to her like she's his fucking _keeper_ and now she's terrible because when Naruto finds out, he'll _hate_ her for confining his father to her and it might actually _kill_ her—

"Sakura!" Minato's voice is deep and it's angry and it pulls her to her knees. His hand is tight around her jaw and he forces her to look at him. Storm-intense orbs of cobalt, of silver, that glitter like sea-salt and he _looks_ at her. She can feel his disbelief, his anger, his frustration, something like fondness and _pity_ —he's wondering, how—how on earth is it _possible_ to feel such self-hate? Who, with all purposes and intent, conditioned her to feel this much _shame_ and responsibility? He breathes, calmly, too calm to be real, "Don't _ever_ speak about yourself like this, again."

Sakura stares at him with shock and she remembers how she felt earlier.

 _Vulnerable._

And she does _not_ like it.

So she puts her defenses up, it's like a mental roadblock and Minato's surprised by the mental wall. He touches it, it feels like something is tickling her brain and she can't scratch it. Her mental strength had always been strong, impenetrable thanks to Inner Sakura—she might as well tell him that now, but he's still holding her jaw.

"I can't hear you," Minato says suddenly, his grip loosens, and her knees dig into the wooden floor.

"It's a mental block," Sakura responds quietly, "I wasn't lying when I said I was a genjutsu type."

"Genjutsu types are usually adept at chakra estimation and control," He explains slowly, blue eyes probing, "Mental defenses are made, people are not born with them."

Sakura may be able to block her thoughts, but emotions—emotions are something you can hide physically, but when you are within your own person or another's mind, you have no control over them and Minato feels it as soon as Sakura tries to squash it.

 _Fear._

.

.

.

* * *

 **footnote1:** originally, I was going to go for something lighter and softer, but I have exams coming up and one of my classes is political psychology — I guess you can go figure. It's deterring from my original plotline, because now the plot is darker and more intense.

 **footnote2:** it's sort of like walking on eggshells, because Kakashi is doing —something, on purpose. Minato's character is also different, because well, he died when he was twenty-four and Sakura is twenty-one. So mentally and perhaps emotionally, they are nearly on the same wavelength.

 **footnote3:** not much else to say, because this is the blank period.

 _feedback is encouraged and appreciated._


	3. retrograde

**The Nearest Star**

 **By: WhisperedSilvers**

 **Prompt: "Part of me still believes you'll come back."**

 **Summary: The quest for strength comes from the spirit or in this case, the soul.**

X

* * *

 **retrograde**

* * *

It takes her a while to explain to him what a disassociative personality is and then some, coupled with the concept of _Inner Sakura_ , which probably makes her look even more insane, at least to her. Sakura's knees are numb from sitting on her haunches, but she makes no move to voice her concerns, instead she shoves herself against the bedframe and watches him intake the information.

"I've never heard of such a mental defense," Minato tells her honestly, his brows furrow.

"Neither have I," Sakura replies with a shrug, "After my first chunin exam, she made herself quite known and then faded a few years later. I assumed it was because I didn't repress my feelings anymore so she just disappeared, but I always wondered where she went."

"If she was already dormant," He starts and then adds in quickly, "I'm treating her as another entity," he explains, "Then it wouldn't matter if I permanently sealed her. She derived from your mental state. I was a real person and with real chakra. She wouldn't be as dominant as I could be."

Sakura is quite sure, that he speaks suggestively unknowingly.

"What about visuo-spatial distance?" She asks curiously, green eyes pick up the gray light of rainclouds, "You can obviously move around, but it has to be limited, because you're attached to me," she stands up and winces when her knees ache, "This emotion thing too. Is it because our chakras are mixed?"

"Chakra is a mixing of energy," Minato begins, "It's not stagnant. It's a moving, changing, evolving type of energy, because mine is counter-clockwise and your chakra is clockwise, when you tapped into to the Yin seal it pulled our chakras together which leveled out your control."

"In case you haven't noticed," She points out dryly, "My chakra control was shot during my sparring session. I haven't exactly tested it out now because my reserves are dry."

"You still managed to destroy the field," He raises a blonde brow with amusement.

"Barely," She huffs, "It wasn't strong enough. That damage was equivalent to my fifteen-year old self. It was mediocre at best."

"You say chakra control is all that you have," Minato suddenly remembers, he watches her grab a towel from one of her closet doors and some clothes from his drawers, "What do you mean by that?"

"My chakra control is the ninety-seventh percentile," Sakura states blandly, "I'm come from a civilian-based clan. I don't have a bloodline limit and I don't have a furry tenant _._ The only thing that I have is chakra control," she pauses to grab a brush in another drawer, "I'm a paper ninja at best, I work with theory rather than application."

Minato could only stare at her with bafflement as he ingested a summary of her abilities – it's obvious that she struggles to stay relevant – but, people aren't born knowing how and what to do. Teaching is implemented for that reason. Out of respect, for his vessel, he didn't divulge too deep into her memories when he first got sucked into her body, but he saw brief glimpses of _neglect_ and _abandonment_ from his own student.

Disappointment couldn't cover what he feels for Kakashi.

"You are a self-made shinobi," Minato says – he doesn't know why he says this, maybe it's because he was a Kage and he understands or maybe he pities her – before she left the bedroom, blue lightning and steel colors his eyes, "And those are the best types of shinobi."

Sakura didn't look back, but he could feel something small, something quiet tremble at his words.

.

.

.

"So you're telling me," Sakura tries to push down her anger, but she's entirely way _too_ close to strangling her very beloved sensei, "That you antagonized Naruto," she finishes with an irritated squeak, "On _purpose!?_ "

"Sakura-chan," Kakashi sighs with a certain amount of chiding that she bristles and Minato is bewildered by her temper. He places down his brush and crosses his fingers pleasantly, "Naruto may be strong enough to be Hokage, but there are certain things he's either ignorant towards or he chooses to dismiss. Politics for one. Trade. Treaties. The Daimyo. Intercultural-relations. The economy. Infrastructure. Objectivity," he makes a gesture with his fingers, "I could go on, but becoming Hokage, as I've learned, is not an easy job," he rubs his face, "I don't know how sensei did this."

Minato's laugh curls like smoke around her veins.

Sakura looks at him with exasperation.

"—Shikamaru is a close second in terms of candidates, but he's head of his clan now, making him my successor would put a strain in the council. ANBU will change the three of you, the dynamics are—"

"I know," She grimaces, part of her is still in shock that Kakashi is practically _fawning_ over her, "I remember when I had to deal when I went through the ROOT archives."

"So you understand that it's a necessary evil and you know what ANBU will expect of you," He tells her and then he shrugs, "If I have to give Naruto a kick in the ass to make him think seriously, I'll do it, but Naruto is not ready to be Hokage. I know you would never take Naruto's dream away from him," Kakashi speaks seriously, "But if the situation calls for it and I'm not here or capable of making a decision, you _will_ be my successor."

"There is no person better suited for the job than you, Sakura-chan," Kakashi's eye crinkles, "Which is why you need to train _super_ hard for the ANBU exams and become part of my platoon."

Sakura's can barely function at this level of incredulity. There are too many things happening. Her brain can only capture one thing at a time. Intelligence. Politics. Council. ANBU. Successor. But the most, terrifying, and mind-boggling conclusion was that Kakashi-sensei is _serious._

"Any other questions, Sakura-chan?"

He waits and then waves off her speechlessness with a smile and tells her as she leaves the room, "Remember, your assessment is later today! After lunch!"

Sakura pinches the bridge of her nose.

How, on earth, does she end up in these situations? She's a civilian-bred shinobi and she doesn't have the physical prowess that it takes to become Hokage. Pushing aside superhuman strength and her Yin seal, she's not very adept in the basic ninjutsu and genjutsu field, especially kenjutsu. Her manipulation towards medical jutsu and chakra control keeps her creative.

Minato interrupts her thoughts, his own thinking interweaving with her's, _I never thought I'd see praise from Kakashi._

Sakura snorts despite herself.

 _You and me both. Kakashi-sensei never bothered to really acknowledge me while I was growing up. The war changed him._

Minato nods his head, _Sometimes it's for the better and other times it's for the worse._

 _You're not upset?_ She asks him suddenly, her eyebrows furrow, _I mean with what sensei said about Naruto?_

She thinks, at least, Minato would have some inhibitions or some irritation as to what Kakashi said when he spoke of Naruto or, cruelly examined him with the scrutiny of a microscope. It can't be easy for someone to practically derail their son in front of them – at least inconspicuously – and quite brutally at that.

 _Kakashi is right,_ Minato nods, he shoves his hands into his pockets as he walks next to her, _Naruto may be a war hero, but he doesn't know how to run a village. He's been in and out of the village for a while, hasn't he? When he trained with Jiraiya-sensei he was gone for three years. I did roughly eight-five missions for diplomatic, political and economic purposes, but that was hands-on training._ He looks at her with a shred of exasperation, _Sarutobi-sama did not give me the Kage-ship until I knew the law backwards and forwards. I still had to have administrative training._

Sakura took her time to process that tidbit of information, _Administrative training? Really?_

 _Hokage duties primarily deal with more paperwork than anything,_ Minato chuckles, _Treaties, trade agreements things like that, but I think you already knew that._

Sakura shakes her head, _I've been doing Tsunade-sama's paperwork for years, sometimes she just drinks and tells me what to do,_ she wrinkles her nose, _I never heard of administrative training._

 _When I was in ANBU, I was out in the field, Kages stay in the village and they run the village. Not the field,_ he differentiates with a sigh, _I never had much patience for paperwork._

Sakura breathes a laugh.

"Forehead-girl!" Ino's voice snaps her out of her mental conversation, platinum blond hair shines like corn silk in the wind, she smiles and pokes her shoulder, "I haven't seen you in a minute."

"Ino-pig," Sakura greets and walks with her, "The hospital is kind of busy and I just got back from a mission."

"Eh," She shrugs, "Still, you owe me lunch."

"How do _I_ owe you lunch?"

"Because you nominated me to be a Jounin-sensei and then disappeared," She scowls and crosses her arms over her chest, "Now I'm officially instated."

"Really?" She raises her brows, she didn't know Kakashi would take her seriously, but after Asuma's death and the aftermaths of war, they need to build back their force, "When do you get your team?"

"Couple weeks I think," Ino replies, she sniffs, "What about you? Thinking about teaching?"

"Kakashi-sensei wants me to take the ANBU exams," Sakura drops that bit of information a little too casually for Ino to gain equal footing, she ignores her gape and continues, "Plus, now that I'm the director for the hospital in the south district, Tsunade-sama is going to have you running back and forth as a representative, and I think I deal with enough children on a daily basis."

 _Director of the hospital?_ Minato asks quietly, he looks at her and then back to Ino.

 _Originally I was head of the central hospital, but since Tsunade-sama's retirement, she took back her title._ _We opened another hospital in the south district, which is where the civilians live and I've taken over as Chief of Medicine, but I don't normally use that title unless it's an emergency. I'm the Director for Children's Mental Health since the war ended,_ Sakura explains, her hands tighten around her elbows, _Adults can heal quickly, but children take time._

"ANBU exams?" Ino can't wrap her head around the idea of her best friend applying for ANBU, her lips thin, "ANBU isn't a joke Sakura. After Tsunade-sama got into power, my dad told me that they completely redid the ANBU curriculum. Protocols, ranking, missions, and divisions. Everything." She raises her hands up dramatically, "And I mean _everything_."

"I know, Ino-pig," Sakura sighs, "I was given full authority into ROOT after Pein's invasion. I know what they did, but I don't know how much sensei changed the curriculum since then. New regime changes mean that some programs and policies are either redone or vetted."

"You sound like a councilman, Sakura," Ino points out with a frown.

 _I hate sensei._

Because now, she's starting to see what he's talking about.

Minato has the nerve to _laugh_ at her irritation.

"I feel like one," She grumbles.

"What's with your eyes?" She asks suddenly, she grabs her face and _looks._

Sakura is almost uncomfortable with the intensity of her gaze and she can _feel_ Minato's stiffness. Carefully, she grabs both her friend's wrists and removes the appendages off her face. She answers slowly, "It's another Yin seal, for more chakra storage."

"You're _still_ competing with your teammates?" She frowns and then rolls her eyes, "When are you going to forget about those thick-headed powerhouses and start living your life? The war is over and, I mean Sai already asked me out on a date."

Sakura nearly trips, Minato's arm around her shoulders is like steel, so to Ino it looks like she catches herself, she turns to give Minato – who's standing next to her – a grateful look and then inquire with disbelief to her best friend, "Sai asked _you_ out?"

The mental image of Sai and Ino together that Sakura puts together makes Minato question his sanity— _that's Sai?_

She bristles, "What's so wrong with me and Sai?"

Sakura blinks, obviously there's nothing wrong but, she thinks for a moment, "Nothing. It's just Sai and his emotions…" she pauses, "I don't know. I didn't expect it."

Ino's eyes soften and it makes Sakura nearly recoil because _when_ did Ino become so, understanding? And it's a bitch thought, that much she knows, but Ino has always been, she's always been the materialistic type, the vain type—but war _changes_ people and it's different for her. She hums, "I know, but he's trying and he's becoming really," she pauses and then smiles, "Good."

Sakura tries to squash the faint wisp of envy before Minato can feel it, but Minato feels everything and so she does her best to ignore his stare. She punches her shoulder, "I'm happy for you, pig."

"You don't need to be so violent, forehead," She winces and rubs her shoulder, "But thanks," and then she pours salt on blood, "Now, you didn't answer my question. What's going on with you and Sasuke?"

And Sakura shoves that mental wall back up.

As if she needs Minato to _hear_ her thoughts about Sasuke, even though he can feel what she's feeling, she doesn't want him to understand what she's feeling. She clears her throat, nerves knotting, "What about him?"

"Has he made a move?"

"You've been reading way too many romance novels," Sakura laughs forcefully, "And honestly. I don't care."

Minato can feel her lie and it's like a pebble dropping onto still water.

"What do you mean you don't care?" Ino asks incredulously, "You've been in—"

"Ino!" Her voice is higher, sharper, her mortification an all-time high and the briefest bits of heartache swallow her chest, she tries to even out her voice, "I don't want him."

 _Not anymore._

Ino seems to understand and she nods, "Good. You're too good for him anyway."

Sakura's anxiety lessens, but she's still tense and Minato isn't saying _anything._

"Anyway, not that I don't enjoy catching up," Sakura tries to run because, Ino's mouth is never safe, "But is there a reason you're following me?"

"How arrogant," She snorts and then she remembers, "Tsunade-sama is looking for you. Something about a scroll?"

Sakura drops the wall, "Where is she?"

—

"Close the door, Sakura," Tsunade orders her and when she does, she immediately sets a sound barrier around her medical office.

"Tsunade-sama?" Sakura asks nervously and walks over to her desk.

"Is Minato there?" She asks with amber eyes, her arms underneath her chest.

She stiffens and turns her head to look at the Fourth who stares at wide eyes. He looks at her and nods.

The pink-haired medic confirms, "Yes."

Tsunade sighs, she pulls out the blasted scroll that got her into this mess and presses her hands to her head, "Goddamit kid, what the hell were you thinking messing with fūinjutsu and demon chakra? According to the carbon dating and blood analysis, you _just_ started learning Whirlpool seals when you made this!"

Minato winces at the scolding, _I'm sorry, Tsunade-hime, but you already know the answer to that._

"He says you already know the answer to that," Sakura acts as a medium and takes a seat on the chair in front of her.

"Tell that dumb blonde – who gives _Naruto_ a run for his money – that he didn't finish the fucking _seal_ ," She growls, "Which is why his soul is attached to my apprentice!"

Sakura stiffens, "What do you mean _soul_?"

"I've studied this seal a hundred times for the past few days with the scrolls Jiraiya left," Tsunade begins, "Using blood as an activation key, a quarter of the Kyuubi's chakra and his own chakra, and then he forgets to finish the seal!" She grits her teeth, "He didn't equate his natural energy."

The pink-haired medic's mouth parts, she grabs the scroll and unravels the sealing jutsu, her eyes already picking up the equation and she does the math. Then, she hisses, "Minato, how did you forget to integrate an exit cipher?!"

Minato's reading over her shoulder, his hair tickles the side of her cheek and she feels his warmth, but she's far too pissed to feel uncomfortable. _The exit cipher is on the bottom right of the scroll._

Sakura's eyes trail down, "The cipher is smudged."

"How is it smudged?" Tsunade asks with barely restrained irritation.

Sakura turns to stare at Minato, but then she remembers the nin that chased her during the mission. How they used ninjutsu to throw into those trees and how she snatched the scroll but didn't open the scroll when she grabbed it.

Unless.

 _Unless those nin opened it first._

"Those nin that ambushed me during the mission," Sakura starts, she thinks back to the bone masks, "Do you think they opened the scroll first?"

Tsunade considers that notion, a little bit more relaxed, "It's possible. They can purposefully alter the seal without activating it."

"But why?" She asks, "The purpose of the scroll is to seal a demon or something into a vessel. What could they possibly want with a scroll that doesn't really have much value?"

"It has demon chakra," The Fifth tells her, "Anyone would do anything to get their hands on demon chakra, even if it's mixed with Minato's chakra because it's the last of what's left."

 _Altering the seal would've sealed me to them regardless of their intention,_ Minato interjects and then he thinks _unless they didn't alter it on purpose._

"How do I unbound him?" Sakura asks suddenly.

Tsunade grimaces, "I don't know if you can. Yang energy is different, you are bound by Yin energy, which is spiritual, and since the both of your chakras are merged," she stares at her with scrutiny, "If you tried to separate your chakras, it could cripple you, Sakura."

Chakra is always a difficult concept to grasp, inputting and outputting chakra means that control has to be precise, but forget precision, timing is also important because energy _moves_ and it can unravel just as fast. To separate chakra means that you have to split yourself in half, it's not like it's a cursed seal where chakra is layered on top, yin chakra is _merging_ and it's threading into a tightly-knit stitch. It's interwoven and nearly impossible to break.

"But you aren't bound by Yang energy," Tsunade's voice gives her a sliver of hope, "Which is why you can probably see him, but can't touch him."

And it's _creepy_ how she knows that.

"I'm going to advise Kakashi to implement some scouting missions," She sighs, "And I'm going to pull him in the loop, but no one should know about this. Not even Naruto. I don't think I have to spell out what problems— _international_ crises can evolve from this."

"No, Tsunade-sama," Sakura answers, her head is killing her from all this information. As if she needs Naruto to know that his dead father is haunting her as if she needs that stress, her temper mixed with confusion and irritation can only lead to so many fights and she really does _not_ need that right now.

And it's back to the Hokage's office as soon as she finds her feet. It's noon and she's waiting in the office as her sensei rattles off some nonsense about his new book from this new author and Minato's shock at his pornography-loving student—where did he go _wrong?_

"Well?" Kakashi waits, his tea steaming in front of him.

"You want us to rewrite the treaty?" Naruto stares at him with absurdity, he stands in front of the desk with a scowl.

"I want _you_ to rewrite the treaty," The Hokage corrects, "You're going to have put in simplistic terms while integrating the new Kumo section and economic policies, all the while decoding Third's encryption," he shakes his head sadly, "Unfortunately, the old man still used coding from the First's era."

Sakura almost wants to laugh at Naruto, he deflates like a balloon, his shoulders hunch, and his sad puppy eyes almost glossy.

"Sasuke," Kakashi starts with a crinkle in his eye, "You're going to be traveling to Mist to visit the Water Daimyo for a week. You're going to introduce the new foreign policy act which allows both the Water and the Fire Daimyo to do trade for the civilians," He tries to emphasize, "Not for shinobi, but for _civilians_. We took a devasting loss during the war and civilians are not built to withstand such complexities in our government and health issues from the war – not to mention the new standard for living – using the Daimyos, – who are non-shinobi – can prevent the quiet tendrils that could arouse a civil war," he watches the last Uchiha flinch, "It's a good-faith gesture if you will and I thought, what better person to introduce to the civilian district as a representative from our country, none other than Uchiha Sasuke."

Shikamaru points out, from his desk on the left side of the room, "But, the Daimyos hate each other."

"I _know_ ," Kakashi's eye crinkle creases even more, "Which is why the mission duration is indefinite."

Sasuke stares at him with disbelief.

"After the Daimyos have agreed to the new policy, you are to then to hunt the remaining members of a resistance force known as the _Mizuchi_ ," He turns to Sakura with a wink, "I heard from a little bird that they want to assassinate the Water Daimyo and we can't have that happen while you're in the country, hm?"

 _When did Kakashi learn to play politics?_ Minato stares at his former student with incredulity, proud he is yes, but still incredulous.

 _I told him to do this last week,_ Sakura groans mentally, _The government in Mist is getting worse, especially since their resources have taken a hit since the war, they're going to have to do something or they'll have to file for bankruptcy soon._

"And dear Sakura-chan," The Hokage sips his tea and Sakura feels the need to run, "I can't exactly send my favorite student out in the wilderness to face disgusting, perverted, irritating little politicians," he ignores Sakura's scoff, "The hospital is clearly in need of your expertise and with the new programs you're implementing in the south district, it's clear that you can't be running around. So, you're going to be training with me until your legs stop working, and host our first annual three-day spring festival."

Shikamaru stares at him as if he's lost his goddamn _mind_.

"You're giving dickless and emo, political and administrative work, while ugly here has to plan a party?" Sai asks bluntly, his eyes widen with surprise.

"Sakura-chan is an ambassador," Kakashi shrugs while he pours some more tea, "She can rewrite the litigation and reduce unsubsidized debt with her eyes closed," he pulls out a set of scrolls, "The _Sakura_ festival," he winks at his pun and Sakura has to force herself to relax or she would attack the Hokage in broad daylight, which in fact, is _illegal_ , "Is actually to enforce the new relations Konoha has acquired since the war. Keeping good relations and unity is of the utmost importance," he stops smiling, "We can't afford another war," and then sips his tea, "We have to play mediator because there is still bad blood with other countries, the shogun of Iron has already sent warnings to other villages that the country still remains neutral."

"The shogun already agreed to come, didn't he?" Sakura finally speaks, her eyes exasperated, but somehow, she's not surprised.

"Right as rain, Sakura-chan," He nods, "The festival is in three weeks, you're still going to be preparing for the ANBU exams."

"And how are we going to do that?" Sasuke demands.

 _Minato,_ Sakura starts, _What can you tell me about the ANBU exams?_

Minato leans against the window, he crosses his arms and stares at her while Naruto voices his objections towards paperwork.

 _When I was in office, ANBU exams tend to conclude of four requirements, intelligence – which usually is based on international laws – combat, torture and you have to have a fellowship within one of the shinobi sectors._

"ANBU exams, now," Kakashi clarifies, "Is five sections. Intelligence, combat, torture, a fellowship within one of the shinobi sectors and then a psych exam."

"A psych exam?" Sakura says slowly.

"Most ANBU shinobi are put under high amounts of stress and strength," Shikamaru answers for her, "ANBU are conditioned to derive themselves of all emotion, their sole purpose is to serve Konoha and Konoha alone. The subject of teammates and teamwork does not exist in ANBU."

Naruto blinks slowly.

"It's a dog eat dog world," Kakashi presses his lips together, "Everything I've told you about teamwork and working together in groups is exempted from ANBU, yes you are put in squads and yes you have to follow a captain, but if the mission goes to hell and you have to leave—you _leave_ , even if you have to _leave your teammate behind_. Solo missions are created for that purpose, to limit the number of deaths, but they are times where you do have teams, protocol is different for ANBU. If your teammate cannot continue on the mission, you must leave them behind."

Sakura did not know that, _that_ was part of ANBU. Everything Kakashi has taught them – no matter how little it was – she had to throw it out the window, because teamwork and teammates did not exist outside of Konoha. Maybe, that is why Kakashi left ANBU. Maybe he couldn't take it anymore.

"What about these fellowships?" Sakura asks again, she decides to clear the air before Naruto can open his mouth and yell that this isn't _right_ and this isn't how it's _supposed_ to be, part of him is right that this isn't _how_ it should be, but the village has to come first and to be Hokage, that is how you have to think.

"Tactics, Torture and Interrogation, Analysis, Medic Corp, Correction Facility, and R&D," Shikamaru lists, his fingers twitch against his brush, "Those are the only sectors that are still standing, everything is else is still rebuilding."

"Since Sakura-chan is co-executive with Tsunade-sama of the medical corps because Shizune-san is in Suna setting up the hospital," Kakashi begins, his fingers brushing the back of his neck, "You can do a fellowship with either one of them. I was going to exempt Sakura-chan from the fellowship, but Shikamaru is _dying_ to have her tactics."

Shikamaru scowls and ignores her green eyes, "I said we could _use_ her in the Tactical Department."

"Uchiha will fit in better at either the Correction Facility or T&I," The Nara continues, "As for Naruto, I think you should consider T&I too," his lips thin, "T&I or Analysis."

"What do you think, Sakura-chan?" Naruto asks suddenly, his eyes so very blue and earnest, as if he's not angry at her, but still values her opinion, and sometimes she thinks that he doesn't know what to do with her.

 _Minato?_

Because that's _his_ son.

Minato does not give her an answer.

But if Naruto, she swallows, if _Naruto_ really wants to be Hokage, he has to _understand_ and should she condemn him to a world where he truly _understands_ what being a shinobi means? Who is she to decide? But if he's _really_ asking her—

"Sakura-chan?"

"T&I," Sakura says suddenly before she can change her mind, and it _will_ change him, because Naruto has not seen half the things she's seen and maybe, when he does, he will finally _understand_ that being a Hokage, is not all awe and happiness, because if everyone is happy, you're doing something _wrong._

You are not _respected_ because you're the strongest ninja in the village, you are _respected_ because you have to make the hardest decisions every day and take the backlash unflinchingly, you have to take the criticism and you have to understand that this is what makes a _Hokage,_ and it's a sacrifice.

 _A sacrifice._

—

"Are you trying to _kill_ me?" Sakura yelps as she dodges the fifth water dragon he tosses at her, her fingers dig into the earth and she grabs on for her dear life.

"Your reflexes are still admirable," Kakashi jumps down with his kunai and swipes to the left.

"That's because I'm a medic," She scowls and shoves herself to the right. Her hand catches onto the trunk of a tree and she flings it at him.

Kakashi's not expecting such agility from his student, he can't flicker fast enough, his shoulder taking the brunt of the blow and he then he appears below her, but she's waiting for him and she snaps her fist _down._

"That was mean," He says, twenty feet behind her, and he's limping.

 _I got Kakashi-sensei's leg._ She's somewhat dazed, but it's the good type of daze because she got _Kakashi-sensei's leg._

"Never sneak up on a girl, sensei," Sakura chastises him and sets his leg. Minato walks over as she heals him, her body is aching, parts of her just wants to lay on the grass and _sleep._

"I always ask for consent, Sakura-chan."

She flushes at the innuendo, but she does not reply verbally. Her knees are sore on the ground and she shoves herself against the tree. Spine straight and exhaustion heavy she sighs. "You shouldn't single me out like that sensei, you know how Naruto gets."

"If Naruto can't take criticism from people cares about, how do you expect him to grow?"

"Can't you bully Sasuke instead?" Sakura scowls.

"What happened to your undying love?" Kakashi teases, he ruffles her hair and quotes from his favorite series, " _It's burns like the sun and hurts like thorns of orange-colored roses."_

"It kind of died when he tried to kill me twice," She deadpans, she crosses her legs, and questions him exasperatedly, "And _Icha Icha Tactics_ really? What does _Ryo-san_ know?"

Kakashi stills and then turns his head. His voice is filled with such elation and pride, "You've read Jiraiya-sama's books, Sakura-chan?"

"It's on the back of the book, sensei. It's impossible to miss the words," Sakura tries to ignore the heat rising to the back of her neck and Minato's blatant staring.

 _His first book was the best,_ Minato interjects with a quirk of the lips.

Sakura turns to stare at him disbelief.

"Didn't Minato-sensei tell you he was a big fan of his books?" Kakashi asks gently.

"No, I didn't know that the _Fourth Hokage_ reads porn," Sakura scowls, a headache beginning to throb beneath her left eyelid, somehow she can't imagine, Minato sitting at his desk in the Hokage tower reading porn.

 _I'm surrounded by perverts._

Minato snorts, he takes a seat next to her – a little too close to her if she's being honest – and tells her, _it doesn't have much sex, it's mostly drama and adventure—I've only read his first book._

 _I am_ ** _not_** _having this conversation with you._

"I didn't know what it was either until I was fourteen," Kakashi admits and then he sighs longingly, "I have a whole case in my apartment now, I couldn't put them down."

"I am _ignoring_ you."

"But have you read them, Sakura-chan?"

 _If you read them,_ Minato muses, _wouldn't that make you a pervert?_

Sakura growls more to herself than to anyone, in particular, she did _not_ read them, she read the _summary_ , "It's a shame I can't hit you."

"Who?"

She refuses to dignify that with an answer, not even when Minato's trickle of amusement tickles her nerves, her mortification only spiking and annoyance simmering.

"I'm going to teach you some water jutsus," Kakashi informs her, "It's about time you start picking up your elemental ninjutsu. I know a handful of earth jutsus and I don't think you really need a lot since you can pretty much create an earthquake."

"Don't you have things to do?"

"Not really, Naruto and Sasuke are actually doing all my work," His eye crinkles, "Good job on that water Daimyo argument, the council agreed that it's a good way to keep relations steady. Offering a nin to clean up their mess seems logical."

Sakura shrugs, "Not that big of a deal."

 _You don't give yourself enough credit._

Minato speaks to her as if he knows, as if he knows what she's been through and she wants to voice her concerns, but part of her is probably wondering if he _does_ know her. If his soul is so intertwined with hers, maybe he _does_ know her, but at the same time, he really doesn't.

"Sakura-chan," Kakashi's voice overlays with exasperation and scolding.

Sakura puts up her mental wall.

"Why are you even bothering to train me, sensei?" She suddenly asks and it' s bitterness that tangles into her heart. It's a weakness, to hang on to the past, to hold a grudge, but Kakashi has never really taken an interest in her, so she feels somewhat cheated. She's confused, but most of all she's disappointed, "You didn't bother with me when I was a genin, so why are you starting now?"

—

Minato's predicament is not exactly ideal, he doesn't know where to start and he doesn't know how to accept his current situation. Here, he is, stuck to Konoha's top medic, his son's teammate and his student's student, but somehow, he knows it could've been worse. It could have gotten much worse. He'll bite his tongue and go along with whatever his vessel wants, it's not like he has much of a choice, after all.

At least she's competent.

That was his first thought.

Sakura, he soon realizes, has a shrewd type of intelligence, half of her brain works on rational, logical thought and the other half works emotional and mental balance. She's always planning, planning something, not for herself, but for others and she has a certain shard of ruthlessness to her. It's cold and hidden, buried beneath layers and layers of self-doubt and inadequacy.

The depth of her emotions is never-ending because she empathizes and she wears her heart on her sleeve, she purposefully leaves herself _vulnerable,_ because her emotions _are_ her strength and she _uses_ them. Embedded deeply in her soul, she burns and she will not be satisfied until things are done in a way she deems acceptable. She will manipulate and she will shape the outcome to her _will._

But she cares and she cares and she _cares_ about everyone and _everything._

She's built herself up, she's determined to live and her ambition no matter how murky it is now will become clear, clear like a diamond when she sets her sight on that goal.

He feels humble, to be in such a strong but kind container, perhaps it was luck that led him to her – a teammate of her son and student of his student—the _convenience_ – she lacks conviction and drive because she is and will always be a bleeding heart.

Kakashi has always been a prodigy in his own mind, but he is haunted by his ghosts and this is why he second-guesses himself. To lead means that he must face the future and not the past, and yet, he's looking for atonement.

Sakura's bitterness and disillusionment are reasonable, she feels weakness for holding grudges and she's aware of it too, but she doesn't dismiss it because she wants to _understand,_ even if it makes her weak.

Kakashi winces at the jab, but he doesn't defend himself because he knows it's justified and he sighs. When he sighs, Minato has to bite back a flinch, because it's a _tired_ sound, so tired that it borders on weary, like the world is too heavy and the sun is too bright, and he doesn't want to do what he's doing anymore. It's the sound of an old man and it grates his bones, "I know I haven't been a good teacher to you Sakura," he leaves the affectionate honorific out as a sign of his sincerity, "But I want to give you the support and training that you deserve. Sasuke and Naruto have always been in a league of their own and you held your own. You rose to the ranks and demanded respect, you care about your old sensei and that's more than I deserve."

Sakura's eyes widen at his honesty.

"You listen and you don't act until you're completely sure you have a way out," He tells her, his fingers dig into his pocket, "You are one of the best shinobi out there and I am proud of you," his eye crinkles, "I just wish I was there to help you."

Her heart is heavy in her chest, she feels sad, but she's also happy.

But part of her wonders, if he's just doing this because he feels guilty. Does he pity her? Or is he upset that he wasn't the one to teach her?

Minato knows that her self-doubt and her self-confidence started from her childhood, but she didn't know Kakashi would be a cause and _not_ a symptom. He's making up for lost time, and that's an old man's belief he realizes, and it makes _him,_ he, the Fourth, guilty, because—because his life was a tragedy, and Kakashi _suffered_ for it.

Rin _died_ for it.

Obito and Obito—he didn't even know where to _begin._

Minato was probably deemed the most selfless of all Hokage, but he disagreed because he believes he is the most _selfish._ He knew that the seal on Kushina would weaken when she became pregnant, he knew that it would be unstable, he knew that there was a possibility that she could die, but he wanted a child.

He wanted a _child._

He could have adopted, there were so many children orphaned during the war.

But he wanted a child.

With his own flesh and blood pumping through his veins and he loved Kushina so, but she also knew how much Minato _wanted_ a child and she had to give it to him—she _had_ to because that was how much she loved him. She would condemn herself to death, just to make him happy, but Minato thought that he would be able to stop the destruction, her death, the attack—thought he had enough time, but he miscalculated and it cost him.

 _It cost him everything._

"Sensei please stop looking at me like that," Sakura attempts to lighten the atmosphere because it makes _her_ feel guilty for holding in resentment, because Kakashi is her _sensei_ and even if he did not teach her or guide or, he is _always_ there. Whether it be in a tree or checking up on her reports at the tower or smile on his way to HQ.

 _Always._

"Like what?"

"Like I should give you my firstborn," She says uncomfortably.

Kakashi pauses and then asks lightly, " _Will_ you—"

"No," Sakura breaks his leg. Again.

Minato stares at their antics, it's reminiscent of Tsunade-hime and Jiraiya-sama, but at the same time, because Sakura is Kakashi's student and it's really _really_ strange. She has enough kindness, enough compassion to _not_ be angry with him – even though she should be. She should be furious and hurt and _angry_ – but she's not because that's her _sensei._

And Minato _wishes_ , he wishes so earnestly that the world could be just as _forgiving_ as her.

Sakura is everything he wishes to be.

"I'm still not teaching chidori."

"I never asked."

Still, she pats her sensei's head and heals his broken leg, the quiet hum of chakra filling the air.

Minato would pass his legacy on to her, for as long as he should live—as long as he's bound to her, he would pass it to her, he would teach her everything he is and everything he was, because she loves her son and his student and Konoha, and maybe, only then, would he be able to breathe easy knowing that there is someone out there with that much goodness in them.

Kakashi wants to make amends.

And Minato wants redemption.

.

.

.

* * *

 **footnote1** _:_ first, note off to _Blue_ , thank you for your review! Honestly it blows my mind how thoughtful you are, I decided to use Minato's pov as a tool for introspection, I hope you liked it.

 **footnote2** : Kakashi feels guilty for his neglect towards Sakura – as he should adsjkf – but he wants to make amends and leave a little more than a footprint in her life. Minato also has a clearer view of Sakura, her character actually, because he can hear and feel her emotions/thoughts. He thinks he knows her, but he doesn't know her.

 **footnote3:** i'm not sure if I'm satisfied with the depth of this chapter, but it's enough of a basis for the plot, I think.

 _As always, please review._


	4. solstice

**The Nearest Star**

 **By: WhisperedSilvers**

 **Prompt: "Part of me still believes you'll come back."**

 **Summary: The quest for strength comes from the spirit or in this case, the soul.**

—

* * *

 **solstice**

* * *

"So, how's training with sensei?" Naruto asked, he stared at the scroll with a blank expression. His back was pressed flush against Sakura's, with the grass beneath them and the trees above them on training field twelve.

"Eh, it's okay," She wrinkled her nose, "He makes me with train with his dogs sometimes."

"That's just mean," He replied with a frown and picked up another scroll on the left side of his lap, "Pakkun used my frog wallet as a chew toy when I was a kid."

"Gross," Sakura exhaled and looked up at the sky. The question was burning on her tongue, "Are you mad at me?"

He blinked slowly and asked just as slowly, "For what?"

"For Kakashi-sensei naming me his successor or deputy—person," She clarified, "I mean if anything were to happen to him, I'm the next in line."

Naruto stilled, "You're next in line?"

Sakura nodded, "Yeah. Until you've finished whatever training sensei puts you through, I'll be next in line," she paused, "You know if I ever had to take office, I would gladly give it up to you once you're ready."

She would rather her be the one to tell Naruto that she was Kakashi's backup, part of her wanted to spite him for dumping all his responsibility on her plate, but the council was a bitch and she wasn't that _mean._

 _Are you that worried?_

Minato sat on a tree branch watching them, as much as he desperately wanted to talk to Naruto, part of him didn't want to. Naruto was sixteen the last time he saw him and now he's twenty—he was practically a different person. He never knew Naruto the way he _wanted_ to knowhim, but it was hard because his son was nearly the _same_ age as him.

"I know, Sakura-chan," Naruto wilted a little under her soft tone, he knows it's not her fault, but still he felt kind of bitter towards her _._ It took Sai's detached speech and Shikamaru's objective reasoning for Naruto to accept what Kakashi was trying to explain, "I know."

"Good," She said sternly, but her nerves settle and cold relief drops into her stomach like a heavy rock, "Because I'm going to make sensei force you to learn Kiri and Kumo code once you're finished with that treaty."

"Sakura-chan," He whined, "That's not fair, the old man's code is harder than learning fūinjutsu coding."

"Well, I guess you don't want to be Hokage then."

"Ugh," Naruto groaned and slid onto his stomach, "I wonder how the bastard's doing."

She snorted, "I'd kill just to see him be civil with the Daimyos."

"He's probably chewing off his own tongue."

Sakura laughed and popped her spine. Sitting on the grass for so long forced her posture to be rigid, her shoulders were tense, but she was wanted to be here with her blonde teammate. Standing up, she grabbed her pack and turned to Naruto, who was pretending to take a nap. She was struck with a strange thought: they were young, so very young and they were _war veterans_. It was a horrifying thought, even as the sun beats down on them through cluttered leaves, it made Naruto look like a teenager, even with his new outfit, black and black with a shred of orange because he was _Naruto._

"I'll see you later, maybe for dinner, I have to run to the hospital," She frowned, "And for the love of _God,_ no ramen tonight."

"What's wrong with ramen?" He bristled.

"What's _right_ with it?" Sakura cocked an eyebrow and tightened her belt strap, "Find Sai if you really need help. I'm sure he knows some of the codings. He _was_ in ROOT."

Naruto blinked, "Oh. I forgot about that," he smiled sheepishly and rolled over onto his back, "I'll look for him later then."

She waved and used shunshin.

"Did he surprise you?"Minato asked as she entered the civilian district.

"I thought he'd be more mad at me," Sakura explained, fingers twitching against her skirt, "Naruto tends to be hot-headed and tactless at times. He dreams of being Hokage and his no-name teammate manages to become the best candidate? I wonder at times."

Minato actually glared at her and it made her eyelids twitch. He looked a lot more dangerous than Naruto, that's for sure, his lips were pressed into a thin line and ocean eyes became hurricanes within a nanosecond, "Part of me regrets not beating Kakashi over the head with the notion of equality, I would think teamwork would've branched off into that."

Sakura snorted, "I try to not think about it, but sometimes the twelve-year old me makes an appearance."

She greeted the women behind the administrative desks and took the elevator up to the top floor. Technology flourished throughout the countries, trade with Iron and Kumo – who obviously were more advanced – it was getting easier for civilians to keep up with shinobi in terms of comprehension and movement.

"Sakura-sama!" Yuki, one of the orphans, sped down the halls in her wheelchair and grinned, "You're back."

"I told you I'd be back," Sakura ruffled her hair and then narrowed her eyes, "What did I tell you about racing in the halls?"

She chuckled nervously, "Not to?" Yuki shook her head, "I just wanted to see you before Kouga did," she scowled, "He keeps hogging the television."

Sakura rolled her eyes and told her teasingly, "Listen. Koga is a boy and boys are kind of dumb, right?"

Yuki nodded eagerly.

"So if you ignore him," She began slowly, crouching down to the floor, "He might give you the remote."

"But why would he do that?"

She chuckled, "Because he's doing it to bother you."

Her eyes widened, "Really?"

"Yep," Sakura stood up and patted her head, "Now, I know you have physical therapy in twenty minutes, if you go early and finish early, I may _know_ where to find a box of Suna chocolate."

Yuki immediately picked up on her subtle implication, she smiled and saluted, "Okay. I'm off to see Yumi-sensei! Make sure they're strawberry-flavor, Sakura-sama!"

Sakura reminded her, "No speeding in the halls, Yuki-chan!"

Minato stared at the child fondly, almost fatherly and asked her, "How old is she?"

"Nine," She replied, she walked down the hall and made a left down the corridor. The walls were a pale beige, with brown trimming, and she opened a glass door with her name on it, "A building fell down on her during the war; it killed her family. Both her legs are paralyzed," she took a seat in front of her desk, "But she's showing progress, so I might be able to help her."

Minato blinked not understand where she was coming from, paralysis was rare to overcome, especially for that of a civilian, "What do you mean _help her_?"

Sakura rubbed the bridge of her nose, "It's hard to explain, but her neurons aren't completely deadened in that area. Civilians bodies heal a lot quicker than shinobi, ironically, her nervous system has been taxed obviously, but she can feel heat and pressure and the cold, so I might be able to stimulate some electrical impulses with lightning ninjutsu, though I don't have an affinity for it," her fingers grabbed a file in the lower right corner of her open cabinet, "But I can still use it. Her brain and spinal cord weren't injured during the attack, it's just her legs, so I might be able to stimulate a pathway," she shrugged, "But it's difficult because even though she can heal faster, her mortality rate is higher because she's a civilian."

Though he was not an expert at the human body, her explanation was somewhat dumbed down and it made him feel like she was untouchable, because this was _her_ battleground and she knew where and what to do, she's a tactician really, but she felt like she's limited. Part of him was in awe because he _knew_ Tsunade, and to see someone else _surpass_ her—that was a legend in its own right.

"Civilians don't have chakra," Minato pointed out.

"That's why it's difficult. Using chakra on civilians is always risky, because they can't absorb chakra. If we pour chakra into them, it can rupture their cells, and then they're going to be clotting—it gets complicated," Sakura explained, "They don't have reserves, so where does the chakra go? It gets immersed into their bloodstream and blood is everywhere. Which is why I'm really pushing her hard in physical therapy, Yuki will create reserves by building muscle—she just needs enough so she doesn't bleed out once I figure out how to heal her."

"I can see why Shikamaru-san wants you in the tactical department," He commented suddenly, his blue eyes are like two sapphires.

She rolled her eyes, "I'm a planning ninja," she sighed with a quiet sense of conclusiveness, "I have to be."

—

"I think I may have a jutsu that can help you with Yuki," Minato said after she entered the room. She was running in and out of meetings for about three hours, one minor surgery and then another hour of paperwork.

"Oh?" She blinked green eyes and chewed on her dango, "What is it?"

"Lightning Rod," He replied, taking a seat in front of her desk, he rested his cheek against his palm and explained, "It's an offensive ninjutsu. After coming into physical contact with the opponent, the user raises their arm into the air, generating a bolt of electricity which travels through their body transferring the electricity to the body of the opponent."

"It sounds like a close-combat move," Sakura frowned, "I would have to minimize it to something smaller, do you know the ninjutsu equation?"

Minato stared at her, "Ninjutsu equation?"

She looks at him funnily, "Is there something wrong?"

"You know how to do ninjutsu equations?" He sounds baffled, "They stopped implementing that in the academy after the war."

Sakura looks at him with exasperation, "Seriously? I'm not an idiot," she grumbles, "I'll have you know, _Hokage-sama_ , that I was placed within the same intelligence range as you, sensei and Itachi-san."

Minato laughed, a part of him was still in shock and the other part of him was pleased, because she wasn't _boasting,_ but explaining, "You were a bookwork, weren't you?" he smiled in a way that reminded of her Naruto, "And it's _Minato._ "

"I really hate that I can't hit you," She scowled.

His amusement was warm against her fingertips, "It's illegal to hit a kage,"

"I hit sensei all the time," Sakura pointed out, "And you're not Hokage anymore, _Minato_."

"Yes, but I'm sure he deserves some of those beatings." Minato replied nonplussed, "After all, you are his student, right _Sakura?_ "

Sakura felt the fresh cracks of her temper brewing, but she stepped on it like it's a goddamn _cockroach_ , as if she had the time to deal with Minato's _innuendos._ It was so bizarre and strange and just frankly, baffling. She didn't know if he was teasing her or if he was flirting – which just made her want to scream and laugh at the same time – or if he was just not _aware_ of how charming he was. She stared at him with a blank face, even with her thoughts hidden behind a wall – at least for this moment – she could understand how easily this man became Hokage.

And it was _not_ fair.

"The equation, Minato," Sakura pressed, she dropped the wall, allowing her inner musings of strangulation and maiming of his person be known.

It wasn't fair when he merely quirked his lips into a small grin at her thoughts, "I'll write it for you."

"Can you even grab a brush?"

"That wasn't funny, Sakura."

"A shame, I thought it was hilarious," She deadpanned.

Minato and her relationship – if she could call it a _relationship_ ; she was more of a pretty container – was somewhat of an easy comradery, it was strained for the obvious reason, but it wasn't like she had anything to hide. It was getting really hard to ignore how _attractive_ he was—he's probably one of the prettiest men she has ever seen, like how his voice deepened when he laughed, the sharpness of his jaw and the blue of his eyes. God, every time she had thoughts like these, she threw that wall right back up so she can amuse her hormones and then settle for something like companionship.

"It's a wide-scale chakra swap," Sakura commented as she watched him write the equation, kanji bleeding into numbers and dispersing with natural energy. Her chin rested on the desk as she watched his ghostly fingers curve the brush against the paper, "What rank is it?"

"B," He answered and finished the equation with a black drag of the brush, "It doesn't require much chakra, unless you're trying to spread the lightning to more than one person."

"What about if I split it," She pursed her lips and then pointed to the section where tiger meets ram, "Here."

"If you cut chakra here, the lightning will become unstable," Minato answered, his fingers brushed the edge of the scroll.

"I'm going to have to really minimize this, then," Sakura groaned, her fingers root in her hair and then she looked over the scroll, "What about drawing lightning from the sky?"

"Only people with affinities can do that," He points out with a raised brow, "I thought you knew that."

She grimaced, she sipped her cold tea, "You give me too much credit. As I've told you and Kakashi-sensei, I don't _use_ elemental ninjutsu, so I really wouldn't know."

"Well, why not?" He demanded and his brows furrowed, "It doesn't make sense if you have two affinities and you can't use them?"

"I was never trained," Sakura admitted bluntly, fingers dig into the side of her bicep, "I learned medical ninjutsu. Chakra with my fists is just—it's taijutsu, it's not really ninjutsu, even though I don't _need_ chakra to have supernatural strength, it's pure muscle, so I can't really count that for anything. Plus, as a medic I wasn't allowed to go into the line of fire, unless I _had_ to," she pointed to her yin seal, "That's why sensei is teaching me or at least I think so. I mean, my long-distance combat is horrible, and genjutsu is something I'm pretty sure I'll do well in—it kind of reminds me of medical ninjutsu."

Minato listened to her explanation, part of her reply was reinforcement from her earlier conversation with Kakashi, he commented lightly, "You're fighting style isn't balanced."

"No it's not," She affirmed, scratching the back of her neck she scrutinized, "My taijutsu is pretty decent and my ninjutsu is well, average—I don't think medical ninjutsu really counts," she finished her dango stick quickly, "And I can easily get out of genjutsu, but to make one? I only know one jutsu."

He stared at her with stormy blue eyes, the thing with her fighting style – that he figured out through observation and repetition – was that she was adaptable. She was able to figure out the advantages and disadvantages of the situation and come with a solution just as quickly. Being adaptable was a hard skill to acquire, if you took Sasuke or Naruto, for example, they preferred to ignore the setbacks and take action head-on, whereas Sakura, she would analyze the problem and then manipulate the environment to work to her benefit.

But being flexible, that came with survival—his eyes narrowed, she would've had to be placed into an impossible situation to come out with such malleability.

"I'm going to teach you Hiraishin," Minato declared suddenly. He said it so _nonchalantly,_ so simple, so _pleasantly_ , as if he was stating a fact—like the sky is blue, the grass is green and the sun is bright. As if, it was a given—as if there was no _doubt_ in his mind, that—that this was all that there was.

Sakura stared. She stared and she _stared_ , she knew he could feel her shock, her confusion, but what he didn't understand was why he couldn't _hear_ her thoughts even though her mental wall was down, she blinked, "I'm sorry?"

He looked at her, "I'm going to teach you Hiraishin."

It didn't occur to Minato that her comprehension filter had actually _shut down._

" _Why?"_

Minato frowned, "Why what?"

"Why are you going to teach me?" Sakura asked stupefied, it was a cliché response nonetheless, the _I-feel-bad-for-the-civilian-shinobi._ That excuse she meant. She wasn't looking for anyone's charity and she most certainly wasn't going to _beg_ anyone to help train her. Yes, pride was a sin, but so was pity. "Hiraishin. Why are you going to teach me that? Shouldn't Naruto learn that?"

"I think Naruto is faring pretty well."

She scowled, "Hiraishin should be taught to Naruto because you're his _father._ It's his birthright.I am just your container."

Minato would like to think that he was patient, he would like to think that he was tolerant, he most certainly had more patience and tolerance than Kushina for one, but that's all that it was. A tolerance. He had his limit, because contrary to belief, Minato was just as human as everyone else. That being said, he narrowed his eyes at the pink-haired medic, his irritation fed into her confusion and it took her a second to realize that it was _he,_ that she was feeling, "First of all, the Hiraishin was developed by the Second Hokage—there is no _such_ birthright."

Sakura stared.

 _He did have a point._

"Second of all, Naruto can take care of himself," Minato said and then he muttered bitterly more to himself than to her, "He's been doing it for some time now anyway," he cleared his throat, "I'm teaching you because I _want_ to."

 _But what does that even mean?!_

Disbelief flooded her system, if it wasn't pity and if it wasn't for an actual reason—then, how could he possibly _benefit_ from her learning Hiraishin? Logically, it didn't make sense. There would be no reason for her to learn Hiraishin, it wasn't like she wouldn't _want_ to learn Hiraishin.

But, there had to be a _method_ to the madness.

Minato listened to her thoughts carefully, trying to understand why it was so _hard_ for her to comprehend such a small thing, but then it came back to the way she learned and how she _lived._

"Contrary to belief Sakura," He began with exasperation and crossed his arms, "Not everyone has an ulterior motive."

"Unlikely," Sakura snorted, the war made her jaded, cynical and part of her hated what she had become.

"You're my partner now," Minato stated blandly, "My container, my vessel—you're my equal," because she really was, she was a part of him and that was all that needed to be known, his eyes were storm-blue, "I'm going to teach you because I want to, because you make me believe in hope, because you belong to me as much as I belong to you."

And that wall, it went _straight_ back up.

—

 _Because you belong to me as much as I belong to you._

It was hard. Sakura had longed to hear those words. For someone to say, not those exact words, with the same weight of those words spoken by Minato to her—to make an oath, to tie themselves down to her whether hell or heaven came.

It was hard to swallow.

Minato had said it because they were _one,_ because they were in this together even if they were to never separate.

"Why are we back in your apartment?" Minato asked suddenly, he watched her unlatch the door, sliding her fingers over the lock of the doorknob.

"To get my notes," Sakura replied simply, she still hadn't dropped her wall – her emotions were everywhere, contradicting and puzzling – the Fourth had a hard time trying to figure out just what she was feeling, he was satisfied with being left in the dark.

Her apartment was a mix of pale yellow and brown undertones. A reddish brown oak, smooth maple, and white trimming. Her living room was opposite that of the kitchen and she shuffled into her room. In her bookshelf, she grabbed a thin notebook, with white paper peeking obstructively from the green base and she exhaled. She packed her messenger bag with another notebook, a few writing utensils, some riceballs – that Sai had conveniently picked up earlier – and a bottle of water.

"Which training ground did you want to go to?" Sakura asked, her fingers twisted in the brown fibers of her messenger bag as they left the apartment complex.

"Fifteen," Minato replied, shoving his hands into his pockets, he walked beside her, "It has fewer trees and the field is evener. What time do you have to see Kakashi, again?"

"After his stupid movie is over," She huffed. _Icha Icha Red_ came out last month and Kakashi-sensei was _dying_ to see it, but a few weeks outside the country made him seem like he was being punished. Even though Jiraiya was dead, his editor, continued to make those stupid books, and apparently, it was like the toad sannin never died. "Which is probably around six."

"So we have three hours," He nodded more to himself than to her.

"How long did it take you to learn Hiraishin?" She asked curiously and he felt her wall come down.

"To learn," Minato hummed in thought, "I think two weeks? I had to create my own formula and match it to my chakra affinity. To master it, it took me two months."

"Two months?" Sakura inquired with disbelief, "That long?"

"Is it really that long?" He raised a thin brow.

"To master? I would think so? It took me two weeks to learn medical ninjutsu, to master it—I took a month," She replied and then frowned, "But that was because I only used fish. I was a little nervous to try it on an actual patient, pouring too much chakra can rupture their circulation system and put them in a coma."

"Medical ninjutsu is a little different," Minato said slowly, "Chakra control has to be precise, the only way to understand medical ninjutsu is to do it. Hiraishin, well space-time ninjutsu is a much harder concept, because you have to understand the theory before applying it to the field. Space and time are relative, you can't think about it as if it's two things. They are connected, but they _aren't_ connected."

Sakura stared at him, her own thoughts were woven, like silk on a spiderweb, "So, it's like cloth then? They're connected but they have their own pieces?"

He smiled, "That's one way to put it. It's kind of like chakra in a way."

"Do you mean how it keeps moving and not stagnant?" She asked, her lips pursed in thought, "I mean, chakra is always moving and it's never truly gone," she paused, "Unless you're dead. I think," she was confusing herself and she knew it, "Though I can't prove that because, well, you're an example."

"You think I'm stuck in a space-time ninjutsu?" Minato blinked.

"Or something," Sakura shrugged, "Don't you think it's plausible?"

She didn't wait for an answer, instead, she scribbled her name onto the roster sheet and entered the barracks. The blonde stared at her with something akin to uncertainty and that scared him a lot more than he would like to admit, because uncertainty made him _uncomfortable_. It was a simple matter. Her explanation actually made _sense_ and because he was stuck in this form, he had no way of proving that theory, let alone comprehend it. It was a question for another time he supposed, he rolled his shoulders, and decided that he had other things to worry about.

Sakura took a seat against the tree and pulled out her notebook. She bit the inside of her cheek and said, "This is all I have so far."

Minato took a seat next to her and looked over at her notebook. He couldn't resist the laugh building up in his chest, even with or without his help, Sakura would have learned Hiraishin. Written in messy blackberry ink, was technique formulas, she managed to cut down the equation to half of what it was supposed to be, perhaps, that was _why_ she was so shocked when he said he was going to teach her. Sakura had already decided that she was going to learn Hiraishin—by _herself._

"Is this why you didn't want me to teach you?" He chuckled and he swiped his own face, "Because you were teaching yourself?"

She rolled sage-green orbs, "This notebook is half a year old. I almost gave up on learning it. The Hiraishin is a _pain in the ass_ , because you have to balance out the natural energy with spiritual energy, then you have to equate your chakra, plus or minus your affinity, and _then,_ you have to add _something_."

"You have to add a summoning seal," Minato pointed out, his fingers dragged down the paper and pointed to the natural energy substitution, "Here."

"Summoning seal?"

"A lot of people think the Hiraishin is like shunshin," He shook his head, "It's not. Shunshin is limited, the Hiraishin can be used for people, places, things, and objects. Hiraishin is related to summoning jutsus because it's not limited. To mark anything with the Hiraishin, you have to use the hand seals for the summoning jutsu."

Sakura stared at him, irritation and incredulity bleeding into each other, she bit out, " _That's it?_ "

Minato nodded.

"So I spent six months on this freakin' _equation_ because I didn't add in a summoning hand seal?"

The Fourth knew better than to laugh, instead, he blinked prettily and nodded.

Muttering dark curses underneath her breath, she yanked her pen out of her bag and rewrote the equation. She added in a summoning seal underneath the natural chakra and then tied in her chakra affinities. "Like this?"

Minato looked over her math, made sure her chakra reserves matched her affinities and nodded, "Yes, though I can't believe you managed to cut the equation in half. Your formula will be only three kanji letterings."

She shrugged, but she couldn't help but the quiet swipes of elation and excitement building up in her stomach at the thought of a new jutsu, she grumbled, "It still took me half a year."

Minato's fingers dug into her scalp and she tried not to shudder when he raked his nails down to the base of her neck in a mollifying action, "Shut up, Sakura."

She scowled and tried to pretend that the motion wasn't calming, "I could have learned this sooner, but I didn't know the Hiraishin fell under the summoning jutsu classification."

"What did you expect?" He crossed his arms, "You were teaching yourself. Teachers were made for these types of things."

"I didn't have a teacher besides Tsunade-sama and she was _Hokage._ "

"You could've gone to the library."

"And do what?"

"You could've looked for my notebook," He frowned.

"Everything related to you was classified," Sakura said blankly, "I picked up parts of the Hiraishin from Jiraiya-sama's scrolls, Tsunade-sama had let me study them while she was dealing with the aftermath. The only way we knew of you was from the word of mouth. You were like a myth. Half of the academy didn't think you existed."

Minato's lips pressed together, he looked uncomfortable and she could feel his irritation, so she decided not to push it. Instead, she rewrote the equation on a neater piece of paper, "What do I do with the equation now?"

"Do you have chakra paper?"

"Yes."

"Copy the seal onto the paper," He instructed, "Press the paper against the tree and use the summoning hand seals."

Sakura obeyed, when she pulled the paper off the bark, and looked at the rough copy on the tree. The black ink was messy, blurry actually, muddle against the uneven surface of the bark. Fortunately, it was legible.

"We can use this as a basis," Minato explained, "Soon you'll be able to implement the formula into a hand seal rather than ink, but that'll take time. Now walk to the other side of the field."

Fifty feet, her boots dug into the grass, she asked, "Here?"

"Yes," He paused, "Now force chakra into the formula as an input and use the ram hand seal as an output."

Sakura trickled chakra into her palms and dispersed the energy among her fingers—she gasped when she felt herself move forward. It was dark, like she was falling into an endless abyss and her senses were warped. She could barely breathe as she was shoved forward and then slammed into the tree with a seal.

"Oh," Sakura groaned as she slid to the ground, her ribs were bruised, she could feel it and she rolled over. Motion sickness, heavy in her stomach and it rolled up her throat, " _No_."

Minato had the _audacity_ to wince and he scratched the back of his neck, "Right—I may have forgotten to mention that the Hiraishin is _kind of_ disorientating."

Sakura's mouth muttered something very colorful against the blades of grass, her thoughts depicted a range of scenarios, all ending with her strangling the Fourth. Minato was wise enough not to comment, but not talented enough to stop the warm prickles of amusement from trickling into her veins. Her voice was muffled but it sounded reminiscent to the word, " _Sadist._ "

"Again."

Minato's teaching skills were no better than Kakashi's, if she had to be honest. Minato was patient, that much Sakura would give him. Hiraishin was a theoretical type of technique, it required a broader understanding of movement and chakra rather than a hands-on approach. From the fleeting conversations that she had with Kakashi – those that were about his past and what he was _willing_ to share – his descriptions of his teacher were pretty vague. Kakashi had no qualms about expressing the fact that his teacher was a _genius_ , but that he was lenient with them.

Which for some reason made _sense._

Naturally, Kakashi would feel that his teacher was lenient with him, because Kakashi was a _prodigy_ – according to the academy and his instructors – so he obviously felt that his learning and progression was strained, because his teammates were not on his level.

Minato had also drilled the concept of _teamwork_ into them – which was probably the only thing that stuck with her during her short time with team seven – but other than that, she really didn't _know_ Minato.

"You're getting the basics down," Minato assessed as she pressed ink formulas to random parts of the training field, "Your landing could use some work and your chakra input is too slow."

"I wouldn't be slamming into trees if I didn't feel like vomiting every time I activated the goddamn formula," Sakura grumbled underneath her breath and winced when she tasted grass on her lips. Pulling chakra into the formula forced her body to move against her will and without a buffer, she was landing headfirst into the object she inked, and then rolling onto the ground in nausea.

"As soon as you get over your motion sickness, your landing should improve," He said casually, as if it was so goddamn _simple_.

She gritted her teeth.

How she would just _love_ to shove her chakra-infused fist into his _face._

"What do you mean my chakra input is too _slow_?" She paused and then squawked, outraged at his nonchalance.

Minato smiled, "Cut your chakra quicker."

To an outsider, a clan-bred shinobi or to someone with a bloodline limit—his advice would sound strange. Incomplete even, but to Sakura, it made perfect sense. The Fourth wasn't known for his chakra control – even though he had it, because Sakura wasn't the _only_ one with perfect chakra control – he knew how to manipulate the outcome of his battle.

Sakura pulled her chakra into the kanji and cut the flow of chakra just before it overflowed.

She was nauseas yes, but she was _fast_.

Much, much _faster_.

Despite herself slamming into the tree, her speed had improved by seconds and she felt like _lightning._

 _Was this how he felt?_

Minato steadied her shoulders as soon as her brain made sense of the movement, her stomach rolling and he complimented her with a small smile, "That was almost perfect, but becoming one with a tree is counterintuitive."

"Minato," She gasped.

He blinked, "Yes?"

" _Shut up._ "

—

"Gizzard?" Chouji questioned with surprise, he took his time writing his notes.

Sakura nodded, "It's a Suna delicacy."

"I thought that was winter melon and wild grass?"

"That's for Kusa," She paused, "Might as well add that too."

Chouji nodded.

Planning the spring festival was not exactly easy, Sakura had come to realize. After the war, keeping relations were much, much difficult. Inclusion was nice, but it was hard to keep everyone included, because there were so many customs and traditions to remember – internationally – and if there was some form of exclusion—well, there were only a certain number of ways to keep peace.

"What about Kiri?"

Sakura thought about it, she had only come across a few Kiri nin. The Mizukage was quite a character, somehow she reminded her of Tsunade-sama, but other times she was reminded of Sasuke. Chojuro on the other hand, he was quiet and sort of Hinata-like – but that was three years ago – he had explained what Kiri was and what it's like now. "They like anything hot and spicy. Pork buns or curry."

"And the last one we have is Kumo," Chouji announced as he looked at his list.

Sakura sipped her tea and threw up her wall, "Kumo, huh?"

Minato looked vaguely startled at the mental block, whatever she was thinking, she didn't want him to know. His stare was obvious, but she paid no heed to it, her thoughts were filled with blonde hair and dark skies. Then she dropped it, "Stew. Potatoes and beef. Hearty foods. Multi-grains and dango."

 _Dango?_

Sakura clarified, "For me."

Chouji laughed and scribbled that down, "I guess if you're going to be planning the events, might as well put in stuff you like."

"In that case," She flickered her eyes towards the Akimichi head, "Tempura please."

He rolled his eyes.

"Anyway, I appreciate your clan doing this Chouji," Sakura sobered up, "Some of the civilians are baking cakes and stuff too, but you guys are doing the bulk of the work and I'm seriously grateful."

Chouji waved it off embarrassed, "Please Sakura. It's fine. Seriously, the one thing we Akimichis like doing better than eating, it's _cooking._ "

Sakura laughed at that and said her goodbyes to the clan members. Walking out of the Akimichi household was always comforting – not because it smelt like bread, though that is part of the reason – but there was always a warm atmosphere.

"Kumo likes health food?"

Sakura nodded, "Yeah. They're into that health-strength type of thing."

Minato hummed, "Did you spend a lot of time in Kumo?"

"I've only been there twice I think?" She shrugged, "I met a lot of people from Lightning in the medical corp."

"Kushina was kidnapped by Kumo nin," He said suddenly, his eyes were still on her, gauging for her reaction.

Sakura, didn't visibly react. She paused mid-step and her mind was clouded with surprise, but she didn't—physically react. He could hear her thoughts, fleeting and confused as they were, but he felt her _shock._ Minato never really spoke about his wife or his past for one, mostly because, she never really asked and she didn't feel the need to.

His past was his and his alone—what _right_ did she have to ask?

Minato didn't know whether to feel flattered by her respect and understanding for him or irritated and disappointed that she didn't feel like she could talk to him, "They wanted her chakra."

"Kurama?" She finally asked.

If he was surprised that she knew of the Kyuubi's real name, he gave no indication. He would've thought that feelings of disgust or hatred or happiness or something—something equivalent would erupt from that statement, because the Kyuubi was quite simply, a demon. A demon that was used to wage war against the earth and for someone to kidnap a demon from another village—said village should've been jumping for joy that the _abomination_ was out of their hair.

But all he felt from Sakura was quiet surprise and thinly veiled sadness for his wife.

"Yes," He paused, "They wanted the Kyuubi's strength to put it mildly."

"I take it that you weren't happy," She mused.

He snorted, "No," then he paused, "You're not going to ask?"

"It's not my story to tell," Sakura said simply, they passed Ichiraku at sunset, red coloring the sky with golden dust.

"Sakura," Her name fell from his lips like warm sand, slowly, and then quietly. Perhaps he was exasperated, Minato never had someone push his buttons like this, Kushina had tried, but she wasn't exactly successful, because he had found her adorable and he was so hopelessly in love with her that—really, he couldn't _ever_ get mad at her. But with Sakura, with Sakura, Minato was feeling every single emotion he deemed as a weakness. Anger. Frustration. Exasperation. Annoyance. Nervousness. Anxiety. Stubbornness. "Ask me."

She sighed more than aware of his irritation, "What happened next, Minato?"

And it was the way she _said_ it, made him shove her against her shoulder.

"Then I saved her," Minato rolled his eyes at her chuckle. He surprised himself. He was never, willingly violent – unless they were an enemy of course – especially with women and even though he knew that she could handle it, it was still— _strange._

He _felt_ different.

"How romantic," Sakura droned, if the Fourth wasn't attached to her, he would've thought that she was mocking him—the tendrils of amusement wrapped around him like silk.

"What about you and Sasuke?"

Green eyes widened, he wasn't very subtle if that was what he was aiming for—her lips pressed together, even with Minato reading every movement, every thought, every flicker of light passing her irises, he didn't want her to feel cornered, so he continued, "Teammates usually end up together."

"Not mine," Sakura replied and then shrugged, "I think I know them a little too well."

"Naruto?"

A faint curl of horror washed over her, she shook her vehemently, "God _no—_ no offense Minato, but he's more like a brother to me. A really annoying kid brother," she paused, "A sweet one, but infuriating. Plus, he has Hinata-chan."

Minato raised an eyebrow, "Hinata?"

"I suppose you'll meet her soon enough," She huffed, "She's a Hyuuga. An heiress too."

His shock was fleeting, but it felt nice to catch him off guard. "Really?"

Sakura mm'd, "Yep."

"And Sasuke?"

She groaned and turned to look at him abruptly. In the back of her mind, she made sure to do it where there was no one around – she didn't want people thinking she was crazy for talking to empty space – she pointed at him, boots digging into the ground and she interrogated him, "What is with you and wanting to know about _Sasuke_?"

"Because everyone kept bringing it up and I still don't know what's going on," Minato grounded out.

"Is it bothering you because you don't _understand_ or because you're curious or because you're _nosy_?" Sakura's molars ground together, irritation and frustration heavy in her blood because it _really_ wasn't any of his damn business.

And maybe she was being childish and immature and the entire lot, but what the _fuck_ —Sasuke was a subject she wanted to avoid talking about at _all_ costs.

"Sakura," Minato's voice was patient, it carried a very hard edge and it pressed deep into her, "I want to know if you're okay," His eyes a storm-blue, "I know Sasuke was an obstacle that changed Naruto's life, so he must be one to you as well."

And _fuck_ Minato for being so goddamn rational.

Sakura could feel herself getting weaker, the way walls of her heart were bristling and the way her eyes were softening. She bit the inside of her cheek not wanting to give away everything.

She would _not_ bare her soul for him.

She would _not._

He had not earned that right.

Sakura nestled in the bitter memories of her history with Sasuke, she allowed the briefest bits of heart-breaking agony, of self-hate, of self-depreciation, of heartbreak, of _pain_ , escape her mental block and the intensity of her emotions made his stomach _churn_.

"Sasuke," Sakura breathed hoarsely, "Sasuke was everything to me. He meant everything to me, but I didn't mean anything to him."

Minato watched her silently.

"I was in love with him. I was twelve and I hate to admit it, but at first, I liked him for his face," She shrugged, a frown curling against her lips, "I was a dark hair and dark eyes type of girl," she paused, "Then I was placed on my team and I got to really _know_ Sasuke. Even though he would insult me and belittle me," she smiled bitterly, "I still loved him. I probably will always love him, but he tried to kill me, multiple times and somewhere along the way, I had to stop loving him—" she swallowed, "I _had_ to stop loving him because I would only end up destroying myself and that, that wasn't something I could live with knowing," she straightened her shoulders and finished, "So if your question is _am I still in love with Sasuke?_ The answer would be no. Do I trust him? Just enough to watch my back. But am I okay with him and how he's here in the village, acting like he did nothing wrong?—the answer is no. No, I'm not okay with and I hope one day I will be, because he's Naruto's best friend and I can't do anything but accept it, right?"

Minato, he understood her a little better—he saw her like this: she was selfless and she hated being so, because she placed herself in that situation on purpose because she just wanted everything to be _okay._ She just wanted everything to be fine and she, so desperately, wanted to hold onto the very few shreds of normalcy that was left in her life.

Sakura wasn't looking for an answer, she gave him all the information he needed, but not enough to really understand the depth of their relationship and how much she _really_ loved Sasuke, because to delve into something like that—something like that where she would have to relive the pain and the agony, it might send her into a depressive state and she hadn't had one of those swings since she was thirteen.

But Minato's hand was warm and heavy as it slid up the back of her neck and threaded in long, pink threads. Blunt fingernails pressing deep into her scalp, easing a strain that accrued during her speech and then he raked down. He looked at her with the blue of his eyes, a silver glimmer, the quiet trickle of sunset after a hurricane, he looked melancholic, tired maybe, a touch too ancient, and then he breathed with gracious weariness, "Thank you."

Sakura did not appreciate the irony.

.

.

.

* * *

 **footnote1:** ugh, ngl, I struggled with this chapter. Their relationship is new, but it's rocky because they don't know where they stand and Sakura is hell-bent on keeping some distance in between the two of them, whereas Minato has accepted the bond and wants to know everything. But Sakura is not so trusting.

 **footnote2:** idk what I was thinking writing in present tense. From now on the fic will be in past tense, I'll change the tenses from prev. chapters soon I guess.

 **footnote3:** unedited; oh & your long reviews make my semester ten thousand times better :)

 _as always, please review._


	5. mercury

**The Nearest Star**

 **By: WhisperedSilvers**

 **Prompt: "Part of me still believes you'll come back."**

 **Summary: The quest for strength comes from the spirit or in this case, the soul.**

 **X**

* * *

 **mercury**

* * *

"And I thought _I_ was bad," Shikamaru drawled amusedly, his fingers brushed the table in front of her, nails tapping like rainwater and Sakura jerked upright swiftly.

Her brain fizzled, popped and then swam in bright darkness. She blinked rapidly ignoring Minato's sigh of exasperation, she asked bluntly, "What?"

"You were sleeping," he said flatly, glancing over at the pile of papers that were scattered on the desk half-hazardously he bit back a wince, and then he added in with wry humor, "On my desk."

"Oh," Sakura inhaled tiredly, "Sorry about that, Shika."

Shikamaru lifted his hand and waved it off. Judging from the messy scrawl on the left side of the table, he was quite surprised that she managed to look over a little more than half of his battle plans, taking a seat opposite from her he replied, "Don't worry about it, I know Kaka—Hokage-sama is working you pretty hard."

"It's weird to see sensei as Hokage, I know," she rolled her eyes and pulled her shoulders back, her spine stiff.

"It's not that," he protested, and glanced over at the high window of the tower, "Using his genin team as part of his platoon is unprecedented."

"Well, Genma-san _is_ getting old."

Minato laughed, _I wonder what he looks like now, after all, I taught my platoon the Hiraishin._

Sakura separated the stacks of paper into three piles: viewed, adjusted, and unlooked. After grabbing her brush she marked off some of the international partnerships on the border of Iwa. She thought wistfully, _And here I thought_ I _was the only one. I feel disappointed that I'm not special._

His amusement was like warm sunshine at her jab.

"So," Shikamaru started, he began to review the adjusted paperwork, he looked up at her, "How does it feel to have the Fourth attached to you?"

Sakura stilled, her eyes a dark jade as she looked at him, Minato's abdomen nearly brushing her shoulder as he stood behind her, and she hissed, "Shikamaru, that's _confidential._ "

He shrugged, casually, disinterested, but Sakura knew that wasn't the case when she caught the topaz glint in his hard, calculating eyes, "My office is secured and I _am_ the Hokage's advisor."

"Sensei told you?"

"I may have bribed him with a new book."

"Shika," her voice hung in a threat.

Shikamaru raised his hands and then he chuckled, "And Tsunade-sama _may_ have asked me to look into space-time ninjutsu."

She looked exasperated, "Why didn't you just _say_ that?"

"And miss the look on your face?"

Sakura kicked the leg of his chair, not even flinching when he slid off with a muted thud, she said with no real venom, "Ass."

Minato stared. _That's Shikaku-san's son?_

She frowned. _Unfortunately, he's nothing like Shikaku-sama though._

"Troublesome woman," he grunted, he climbed back onto his chair and glared at her.

"I can call Ino if you want," Emerald eyes glinted, "I can assure she won't be as _merciful_ as me."

Shikamaru muttered something colorful under his breath and continued, "Well, how is it having Konoha's Yellow Flash attached to you?"

Sakura scratched the back of her neck, she answered hesitantly, "I don't know. It's strange. It's like Ino using her mind-transfer jutsu, but he's not in my head, he's outside my body and visible."

He nodded slowly and cracked his neck, "I'm going to need a little more detail, Sakura."

She groaned, "I _really_ don't know how to explain it. It's like he's haunting me."

Minato glared at her, _I am not a ghost._

 _How would you know?_

She had a point, he realized.

"Sounds like a bad horror movie," Shikamaru replied dryly, he grabbed the stack of papers and stamped them with a _to go out_ print, "So, he can see me?"

"Yes," Sakura answered.

"He's here, then?"

She looked confused, "Yes? Do you want to ask him something, Shika?"

Minato inquired curiously, _why do you call him Shika?_

 _Shikamaru and I have been friends for a very long time. We met before the academy, he's friends with Ino, so we became friends after we met, and then Chouji followed straight after,_ she shrugged mentally, _It's just a nickname._

Shikamaru's finger brushed the side of his cheek, he looked slightly out of place, unsure almost and it made Sakura do a double-take because she had never seen Shikamaru look so _uncertain_ before, but maybe it was understandable. They didn't grow up during the Yondaime's reign, so they weren't sure how to address him – other than Sakura because she's gotten a first-hand's taste of the Fourth's personality – because the man really was a _legend._ "Hokage-sama, do you still have any of your notes available?"

Sakura quite frankly, wondered, why she didn't think of asking that. Library notes were obviously destroyed, but if he had anything _personal_ he left behind…

 _Unfortunately no, Sakura had said most of my notes were classified and probably destroyed to keep the secret of Kyuubi contained._

"No," Sakura shook her head and crossed her arms, "Remember documents like those were classified, Jiraiya-sama probably took them or moved them or something," she sighed, "I doubt Tsunade-sama would know, Jiraiya-sama took his secrets to the grave."

Shikamaru considered that for a moment, "Do you think Root…" he trailed off, his eyes lighting at the sudden possibility.

She latched on, quickly understand his train of thought, "I don't think so. I went through everything in ROOT, but," her eyes glittered, "I didn't go through the Kage archives. There were documents going back to the First's time."

He shoved right back, "Those documents are double-sealed in the basement of the Hokage Tower."

"I'm sure sensei has the scroll to unlock it," Sakura smiled at that, "I'm sure he'd allow his _favorite_ student to take a quick look."

Shikamaru grinned, "I knew you were my favorite off Team Seven."

"Don't let Naruto hear you say that."

He snorted, "I could just sic Ino on him."

"Hey, that's my best friend we're talking about."

"I thought Naruto was your best friend."

Sakura paused for a moment, "My best _girlfriend._ "

 _Are you flirting with him?_

She nearly dropped her brush in shock, she refocused her attention on the new ANBU schedule, _is that what you would consider flirting?_

Sakura decided, that this conversation, was _beyond_ weird. She mentally shook her head, this really wasn't worth the time. She bit the inside of her cheek, "Do you think your dad had any notes? Wasn't he in Minato's class?"

Shikamaru stared at her for a moment. It took him a bit longer than he anticipated to realize that the Yondaime's name was _Minato_ , hell, nearly most of the shinobi under the age of thirty in the village thought he didn't even _exist_ , it occurred to him just how _close_ Sakura was with the Hokage. Though, he had to consider the fact that, maybe they didn't have a choice. After all, Sakura was the Fourth's vessel, calling him Hokage-sama while say Kakashi – who also was the Hokage and Minato's student was all kinds of _weird_ – he shook his head, "I haven't exactly been home lately."

Sakura narrowed her eyes, "What does _that_ mean?"

He grimaced, "Kaa-chan is still going through Tou-san's things."

Her eyes softened, Shikamaru hadn't taken his father's death lightly, but it's been _three_ years. She was thoughtful, "Have you gone through his things?"

"Just his clothes and anything in the closet," Shikamaru scratched the back of his head, leaning in the back of his chair he sighed, "Tou-san probably left the blueprints to Konoha's underground chambers if I really decided to look."

"They exist?"

 _I thought that was a rumor._

Shikamaru shrugged, "I don't know, maybe."

"You can assign Ino's genin team to prepare a scavenger hunt if you think it's too troublesome," Sakura pointed out sneakily unless it was highly sensitive documents, but she trusted Ino enough to keep it under the table if it had to come to that.

"I heard Ino became a Jounin instructor," Shikamaru made a noise of interest, his eyes glistened, "Was that you're doing?"

Sakura grinned, "Whatever do you mean, Shika?"

He laughed.

The walk to the basement of the Kage tower was a lot more daunting that Sakura realized, it was dark and cold—it vaguely reminded her of the prison somewhere on Crescent Moon Island. It spiraled into a stone stairway, with staffs decked on the walls with orange flames. It just _reeked_ of bad intentions.

"I've changed my mind," Shikamaru decided as he looked at the creepy locks of the underground chamber, "This looks bad."

"Where's your sense of adventure, Shikamaru?" Sakura quipped, she grabbed the scroll and launched it into the gap.

"I left it back at the war,"

She rolled her eyes and read the hand-signs on the sheet of paper that Kakashi had so carelessly scribbled on during his impending meeting with the council. They were messy, loopy and just quite frankly, _so_ Kakashi-sensei.

Minato stared at the paper, _I think it's a boar._

 _Then what's the one next to it? A dragon?_

Deciding to go with a dragon, she bit her thumb, swiped the blood onto the handle and followed the hand-signs, "Release!"

It was an eerie sound. The cracking of metal, copper and the faint smell of octopus ink made Shikamaru's nose twitch, he deduced, "I think the Kage archives _are_ the underground chamber."

"I'll be sure to put that in my novel," Sakura replied, she entered the hall first.

"You're writing a book?"

"If I come out of here alive," she huffed, sidestepping a piece of broken stone, she walked deeper into the hall until she came across a library of some sort, with a wistful sigh, she looked at her companion with direness, "Shikamaru you're going to have to _pry_ me out of here."

 _There are so many books—!_

Minato wanted to laugh when he felt her child-like elation towards the library, scrolls on top of scrolls, and manuscripts bigger than her. He was _right_ —she _is_ a bookworm. It was warmth crawling over his fingertips as her eyes greedily devoured the aesthetic in front of her, walking over to the atlas her fingers brushed a metal protractor and some old knickknacks.

"Hokage-sama will never get rid of me," Shikamaru saw an ancient version of _war games_ sitting innocently on a nearby desk, "Are those real jade?"

 _I have yellow notebooks._

Sakura blinked and asked aloud, "Yellow notebooks?"

"What?" Shikamaru asked confusedly.

"Minato has yellow notebooks,"

Glancing at the dark-rimmed scrolls, green notebooks and bright red stamped papers that were messily thrown over the place, he sighed, "It shouldn't be that hard to find, I guess. Everything here is of darker colors, for discretion probably."

 _Why did you choose yellow?_

Minato flushed with sheepishness, _I have blonde hair._

Sakura paused mid-step and turned to look at him abruptly. Green eyes flickered over to his ghostly form in disbelief, _that's it?_

Somehow, she expected more from him. _Konoha's Yellow Flash_ uses only yellow notebooks because he has _blonde_ hair. Honestly, she thought he would have a little more depth, judging by the quiet flicker of his wounded face, he didn't particularly like that fleeting thought.

"I found it," Shikamaru's lazy drawl filled up the air of the ancient archive, she nestled her way through a jutting stack of what looked like old budget finances and leaped over a table of seals.

"That was fast," Sakura commented with surprise.

"The notebooks are yellow, Sakura," he rolled his eyes.

She frowned, but didn't say anything otherwise, "Well, what does it say?"

"It's a bunch of ninjutsu equations," Shikamaru flipped through the book, "I think it's for the rasengan."

"Ah," Sakura made a noise of understanding, she took a seat next to the window and grabbed the right stack, "I'll start with the side, you can take the left."

"Yes, Sakura-sama," Shikamaru made a noise between a squeak and yelp, he was not expecting her kick.

 _There's a notebook about the Hiraishin and space-time theories—it's fuller than the others. It should have an outline for the scroll I made in Whirlpool,_ Minato added in as he looked over the stacks of notebooks.

 _Did it have black ink?_

He paused, _I think?_

Sakura shook her head and pulled out a notebook that was the third down on the towering stack.

 _It's that one._

"I think I got it, Shikamaru,"

Shikamaru looked over at her curiously, he scooted over towards her as she flipped on the book. Minato's handwriting was worse than Naruto's ironically, she would like to think the Yondaime was as refined as the rumors made him out to be, but then again, if she _really_ thought about it, she was giving him a little too much credit.

"What the hell is _this_ —? Is this _chicken_ scratch?" Shikamaru asked incredulously, he tilted his closer to read the blurred kanji.

Sakura couldn't help but laugh when she felt Minato's embarrassment wash over her elbows, trailing like spider silk up her arms, "I'd expect this type of thing from Naruto."

… _I was excited._

"…equating chakra, while simultaneously outputting yin chakra and then yang chakra," The Nara clan head read to himself and then he paused, "This is Whirlpool dialect."

Sakura looked over to where Minato would be sitting – next to her, a knee propped up against his head as they looked over his things. He blinked, _what?_

He pushed himself closer, his eyes glancing over the kanji quickly and then he sighed, _Kushina had helped with the fūinjutsu part of the seal, she must have written the rest of the instructions in her native tongue—I didn't have enough time to learn her dialect._

Sakura rubbed the bridge of her nose and said, "Naruto's mom wrote those notes, he doesn't know how to translate it—I don't know if Jiraiya-sama left any notes around, but," she wrinkled her nose, "Whirlpool dialect is a lost language."

Shikamaru groaned when finally realized where she was headed, "Now, I'm _really_ going to have to go through Tou-san's things."

—

"I need you to look over the guest list, sensei," Sakura leaned against the tree on team seven's training grounds, she stretched her legs until she could feel her thighs burn.

"I shall have it done by this evening, Sakura-chan," he gave her an eye crinkle.

She glared, "I'm serious, sensei. I only have a week left before the festival."

"You're sending invitations two weeks in advance?"

"I need them to RSVP," she frowned.

Kakashi waved it off.

 _Even as Hokage, Kakashi is still apathetic,_ Minato snorted.

"I'm going to check on the other…stuff," Sakura wrinkled her nose with distaste. Ino has been particularly adamant with decorations and flowers.

 _It's the atmosphere, Forehead!_

Sakura supposed she could understand, but she had left her teenage, wistful thoughts in the war and probably became a lot more jaded on frivolous things such as—ribbons and silk for one.

This time Kakashi made a sound of interest, "What stuff is this?"

Sakura's smile became sharp, "Feminine stuff."

Minato's sigh was like a heavy towel.

"Do tell, Sakura-chan," Kakashi's eye crinkled again.

She stared at him blankly, "Decorations, sensei. What did you think I was talking about?"

Kakashi's smile behind his mask became lecherous, his coal eyes glittered and he propped his elbows onto his desk, " _Well_ —"

"On second thought," she interrupted him, voice taking on a no-nonsense tone, "I don't want to know."

He pouted, "You take the fun out of everything."

Sakura raised a thin pink brow, "You're Hokage."

"And the sky is blue, the grass is green," Kakashi said simply, he leaned his head into his palm, "But does that mean I shrivel up and die?"

"Well, you're halfway there," Tsunade interrupted, she walked in and slammed the door shut. Crossing her arms over her chest, she huffed, "I made you my successor so you can run the village, not so you can read your damn books while your students run around on doing your dirty work for you."

Sakura snorted at the irony.

"None of that sass, Sakura," Tsunade smiled knowingly, "I received a tip that Sasuke did a little more than _swindle_ the two Daimyos."

Kakashi groaned, a headache began to pulse beneath his left eye, "What did he do _now_?"

"Well," the blonde paused, "Both Daimyos agreed for their children to have an arranged marriage with each other."

The Hokage nearly gasped.

Sakura's eyes widened, "What?"

Tsunade snorted, "That's what I said when I heard that too. The Uchiha somehow managed to get the two Daimyos – the Daimyos that _despise_ each other – to arrange their children's marriage so they can help strengthen their bond between the two villages. Politically of course. The foreign policy act was just an incentive."

"So this could either be really, really bad," Sakura started, then she looked over at her sensei, "Or really, really good."

Kakashi looked at her, he ordered, "Send invitations to the Daimyos."

She stared at him warily, "You know we have to invite all the Daimyos if we invite two."

He nodded.

Sakura sighed, "Yeah, like I'd expect anything else. Should I add in any foreign ministers as well?"

"I'm sure the Daimyos will bring their entire entourage with them."

"Wonderful," she deadpanned, "I'm going to have to up the quantity of food and drinks now," she paused mid-thought, "I hope the budget will cover it."

Kakashi replied slowly, "Sakura if you need any more…"

She waved it off, "Yeah—Yeah, I know."

 _Do we still have the emergency funds?_ Minato chimed in.

Sakura furrowed her brows, _we used up our funds after the war. Restructuring and renovation. We accumulated a small amount due to the influx of scouting missions, but other than that it's quite small. We can't afford to spend any more money._

"—kura. Sakura!" Tsunade appeared in front of her, her fingers snapping in front of her face, "Are you alright?"

Emerald eyes blinked, "What? I was just thinking. Did Shikamaru come to see you?"

"Shikamaru?" The Fifth frowned, "No, why? He said he had to dig through some archives."

"He said something about Whirlpool dialect," Sakura purposefully sounded vague, not wanting to give away too much information, just in case. Sometimes irrelevant details were just as important as the real ones.

"Whirlpool…?" Kakashi murmured with narrowed eyes.

"Jii-chan may have some scrolls somewhere," Tsunade said thoughtfully.

"I was going to give you a more formal report when Shikamaru found more information, sensei," Sakura offered her former teacher, she felt slightly bad for keeping him out of the loop, but things just kept happening. If it wasn't in the hospital, it was with Minato and if it wasn't Minato, it was the festival.

The Hokage waved it off, "I know you're busy, Sakura-chan. Don't burn yourself out."

Sakura resisted the urge to roll her eyes.

—

"I think you're ready," Sakura checked her chart and gives her knee a light tap. She smiled tiredly, "We can start the procedure today if you're up for it."

Yuki stared at her, "Will it work?"

She was skeptical and Sakura couldn't blame her.

"Eighty-eight percent," she told her and glanced at her legs, "At most, all you will feel is a little tickle, but even if it doesn't work," she smiled again, "At least we tried."

Yuki giggled, "You don't give up do you, Sakura-sama?"

Sakura chuckled, "Not really."

"It's okay if I have to stay in a wheelchair," she said quietly, "I don't mind."

Being complacent is an adult thing, Sakura used to think. Not worrying about the future because your future was the next day, but the illusion between childhood and adulthood was more of a presence sort of thing. To think about the future, because you want to avoid the past, made you forget about the present.

Because the future was never really certain.

Sakura cleared her throat and stood up. She spoke, "We can start whenever you want. I won't push you but think about it Yuki-chan. You never know what might happen."

She left Yuki in her room with nothing but her thoughts.

 _She's not going to do the procedure?_ Minato asked with wide eyes.

Sakura shrugged, she was disappointed, but she wasn't surprised. _I don't know. She's a kid and it's her body. I can only guide her, but I can't tell her what to do or force her to do something she wants._

It wasn't like Yuki had parents or a guardian for that matter to tell her what to do. Orphans were always tricky. It wasn't because of the subject at hand, it was because they didn't have anyone to turn to for advice. Sakura would've liked to think, that if she leaned on her, she would, in some way, come to a conclusion.

 _She's a child,_ Minato pointed out.

 _Even so,_ Sakura shrugged, _Suffocation is one of the worst ways to live._

In hindsight, this conversation probably wasn't the most important ones they've had up to date. Yuki, two hours later, wheeled into her office and gave her consent for the operation. While it delighted Minato, Sakura felt the slightest bit wary, because what, caused her to change her mind. She wouldn't question it now, she would wait until she was in recovery to have a talk with her.

Hinata had come in to give consultation and then took a brief glance at her chakra network. She gave Sakura the okay and told her that she would be down the hall, should she need another pair of eyes. It still didn't matter, because Sakura called her in anyway.

"Just tell me if anything in her chakra network moves or I don't know," Sakura paused to look over at Yuki's legs, "If _something_ happens."

Hinata nodded, "Her reserves are deep enough," her lips twisted and then inquired softly, "She should be fine."

"I know," she breathed.

 _I just need to make sure._

Minato observed, quietly, like a hum in the back of her mind. Sakura never did anything by halves, she was thorough and she was calm, but still, she worried. After her hands formed the tiger hand seal, she jumped straight to dog and then to ram. Minimizing the lightning ninjutsu was her main concern. Her chakra, when it came to elemental ninjutsu was always shaky at best, but then it stabilized. It wasn't like she was pulling chakra into her hands or focusing chakra – raw chakra – into the palms of her hands, or her feet, or to a mobile part of her body – excluding her hair because what really was the _point_? – she was pouring chakra into seals.

Lightning, bright like the salt in the wind, when the sun hits it just a certain way and it looks silver — it was blinding, but it wasn't gold, no, it burned hotter.

 _Blue lightning._

Minato spoke, _cut your chakra in half, it's too hot._

It's not normal was what he meant to say.

Sakura eased off the chakra, pulling it beneath her elbows and the brightness dimmed into a straw-colored gold.

She licked her lips and instructed to no one in particular, "Watch her pressure."

And she pressed.

It was a mental thing she did. Whenever she did surgeries or rehab or sometimes when she worked on poisons, her mind, it would flow – Tsunade-shishou had called it the _stream of consciousness_ – sometimes it was instructions, sometimes it was words, and sometimes it was things that were relevant to the situation—but, to Sakura, it was like an audiobook of connectors.

 _Seep into the skin, drop into the bones, sink into marrow and swim. Find the blood. Disperse. Push and pull. Nerves are buried in the pathway. Search for fibers. Nerves? Coat. Spray the frayed edges. Tug. Coat. Axons. Synapses. Paint with lightning. Slow and gentle. Rough carpet. Slippery silk. Slip and slide. Now, pull._

 _Next leg._

 _Repeat._

Sakura was like a machine.

 _Rinse. Coat. Spray. Seep into the skin, drop in the bones, sink into marrow and swim. Pull the lightning. Spiral. Twist and twist the ribbon and curl beneath fingers._

Minato's spine stood ramrod straight as her conscious spoke words to her. Reminders. Pulling her attention to different areas of the leg. Sometimes they were repetitive other times they were like pictures. Her eyes were closed as she did these, he noticed. She didn't open her eyes as she shifted the lightning below her knee. She felt the systems with her hands and pictured them with her brain.

It was almost like photographic memory.

Sakura yanked the lightning from her patient's legs and snapped the lightning like a twig – like it was a machine and she unclipped it with the swift flick of the wrist.

"How's it looking, Hinata-chan?" Sakura spoke for the first time in an hour, her voice was dry, but her eyes steady.

"Her chakra network is untouched, there was a slight change at the end, but that's most likely from the sudden removal of lightning," she reported and then scribbled something on the clipboard, "But it looks all right."

"Good," she sighed and then gave a lop-sided smile, "I'm tired."

A week later, when Yuki's physical therapy started to really take root, Sakura paid her visit. She took a seat on the bench closest to the vending machine. Emerald eyes took in the slight wobble in her step, the way she clenched her crutch tighter, but made her way over to her without fail.

"Yuki-chan," she greeted.

"Sakura-sama!" Yuki smiled and took a seat next to her, "I thought you weren't coming until tomorrow?"

Sakura shrugged, "I got excited."

She laughed.

Minato took a seat on the other side of her.

"So, how does it feel to use your legs again?"

Yuki thought for a minute, "I get tired really easily, but Koga said that if I practice a lot then I would be able to play tag with him."

Sakura's eyes widened. A memory or a mental note in the back of her head, popped, like a soap bubble. It answered her unasked question. She made a sound, "So, Koga-kun is being nicer to you?"

She shrugged, a furrow in between her brows, "Sometimes. He told me, before I said yes to the sur-gery," she said the word childishly, "That he had one too."

"A surgery?" Sakura asked even though she already knew the answer.

"For his arm," Yuki explained and sighed, "He said it took a long time, but he was glad he did it. He said it sounded scary at first, but," she shrugged again, "But he had to be brave and—weren't you his doctor, Sakura-sama?!"

Sakura tried not to smile, "Yes. I was his doctor. He was scared, but he said if it got his arm fixed, he would be able to draw with you."

Yuki's eyes widened.

Sakura patted her head, "I think you guys are going to be great friends."

—

"I think, I'm going to die," Sakura groaned dramatically, slumping against the coffee table of her living room.

"Puh-lease forehead," Ino snorted, she reshuffled the papers, "It's not that bad. I mean, you did most of the work."

"I mean what else do I have to do?" she demanded, narrowing her eyes at the annoying stack of checked papers, she threw herself at her sofa and rolled over, "Somehow this feels anticlimactic."

"Well you did plan this whole event in three weeks," the blonde pointed out, "I'm surprised you stayed sane this whole time. I mean Kakashi-sensei threw this at you pretty late."

Sakura huffed, a jade orb looked over at her lazily and grumbled, "I'm pretty sure he did that on purpose."

"He needs to get laid."

A pause.

"I think I need to scrub my ears with soap," she twisted her nose, "Please, stop."

Ino rolled her eyes.

"Back to the subject at hand," Sakura shifted her attention back to the stack of papers, "The festival starts _tomorrow_ and I don't know if I — missed something? Or? I don't know."

"What's to miss?" Ino raised a brow and lifted the clipboard, "Flowers, food, music, decorations, stalls, supplies, we even have live entertainment from kids and performers from the international school in the eastern district. What about hospitality and accommodation?"

Sakura snapped her fingers, in an effort to wake up her brain and she groaned, "The Hyuuga and Nara clan are taking care of that. They have some lodging within the compounds. The Hyuuga clan also owns lands off the compound—no way I'm going to let some obsessive kekkai genkai shinobi in close quarters with them. The Daimyos and their entourage are being placed in hotels near the Hokage Tower."

"Okay," Ino checked that off, "What about for the kids?"

"The Aburame and Lee clans are in charge of running the entertainment part," Sakura suddenly remembered, "We're running it like the how we did in the autumn. You know with fireworks, catching fishes in nets, breaking bottles — those types of things."

"Right, right," she hummed, her pen tapped each entry, "Uh, I really don't know what you're missing, forehead."

Sakura groaned.

Minato, who was sitting on the floor in front of her, looked over at the papers and scratched the back of his head, _I think I took my assistant for granted._

She rolled her eyes, _let me guess. You never threw a party._

 _Even my_ ** _wedding_** _wasn't this complicated,_ he said.

 _Didn't you have an event planner? I would think as Hokage…_

Minato thought about, _actually, Jiraiya-sensei and Kushina did most of the planning. I just had to show up._

Sakura glared at him.

"What?" Ino spoke suddenly.

Sakura blinked, "Expense sheet."

Ino grimaced, "Couldn't you get when of the bank officials to do those?"

She looked at her.

"Right—right, government stuff has to be done by the government," the blonde sighed.

"I mean, an advisor would be nice," Sakura pointed out, "But I doubt sensei would give me one, unless I ask for it. I mean I don't _mind_ planning the festival," she wiggled her toes into a pillow, "I just would've liked a heads-up."

"Yeah, I know what you mean," Ino nodded, she placed the papers into a pile, "Like today, Chouji asked me out."

"To what?" she said absently.

"To dinner," she paused for emphasis and then waved her hands in distress, " _Alone_! I mean," the blonde began to sound hysterical now, "I don't think of Chouji like that you know, I mean we grew up together. Since we were infants!"

"I don't think he meant it like that, Ino," Sakura replied, she glanced over at the schedule for tomorrow, "Did he invite Shikamaru?"

"Yeah, but he was busy or something," Ino thought for a minute, "I think he was going through his dad's things."

She looked up and nodded, "Kakashi-sensei wanted him to look into something," then she tilted her head, "I think you're looking into this a little too much. I mean, what would Sai say?"

Sakura paused at that and shook her head, "Actually, I don't _want_ to know."

Ino giggled at that, "Yeah I don't want to know either."

"Ugh, I just remembered," the chief of medicine groaned, "I have to organize a greeting system for the arrivals at the village gates and the immigration center or it's going to be swamped."

"Let me take care of that, forehead," Ino replied and stood up from her spot, "I'll assign some chunin to the gates and organize some fanfare with genin from my clan."

Sakura sighed and gave her a small smile, "Thanks Ino. Take the attendee sheet and send a copy to sensei. Just write down the numbers and I'll deal with it later."

She waved it off, "I _know_ how to throw a party, greetings are just a small thing," she frowned, "Just get some rest, Sakura. You look like hell."

"I feel like it," she huffed, "I'll be fine. Just need some ice cream and a nap or something."

Ino gave her a sympathetic look, "One of those days, huh?"

"Sasuke's coming tomorrow," Sakura fed her, she placed all the sheets into a stack and stood up as well. Walking to the kitchen, she put a pot of tea, "I think I'm going to keep him on rotation for security and then switch him with Kiba for the second half of the night. Not _everyone_ is happy with him."

"I can imagine," Ino grimaced and slipped on her sandals, "I'll get this done before noon, I'll swing by to pick you up tomorrow."

"Thanks, pig!" Sakura called out as she shut the door.

Minato appeared on a stool in front of her island, he commented, "She's effective."

"She is," she agreed, "She'll bitch a little, but she's very helpful. When it comes to parties and planning, she's like insurance," she poured some water into her teacup, "Ino is a perfectionist when it comes to things like that."

"You're not?"

Sakura considered that and stirred her tea, "I don't think so. Not when it comes to parties and social stuff. Those things will be good no matter what. I think when it comes to policies and jutsu, I'm a bit of perfectionist there. Everything has to be detailed and organized because it just has too? Tsunade-shishou had told me that a clear space, is a clear mind," she chuckled, "If she would only follow her own advice."

Minato smiled at that, "I used to be like that. A perfectionist. Everything had to be perfect," his elbows dug into the counter, "I planned for everything. I had multiple contingency plans. I was idealistic."

"It's not a bad thing," Sakura clarified, "To be idealistic."

Blue eyes flickered from her teacup to the window, Minato agreed, "No, it's not. But sometimes you lose sight of what's in front of you."

"What do you mean?" she sipped her tea.

"I planned for everything. I made sure everything would go a certain way and expectations would follow through," he explained, "But it was just that. I planned, but I didn't live? I just kept going and I didn't enjoy what I had because I was looking at the big picture," his answer was vague, his voice was different, like he was here but not here at the same time, "In the end things, never did play out the way I wanted it too."

 _Regret._

She felt it.

Sakura shook her head, "I think you're being a little too hard on yourself," she didn't want to comfort him and make it _weird._ Instead, she attempted to be honest, "No one could ever predict the future – what we went through. No one could have. Bonds and relationships? Those things, they have a mind of their own. No matter how twisted they are, we can't be sure of where they might end up. I mean, look at Naruto."

She could feel Minato looking at her.

"He made friends with the whole damn world," she shook her head, "They were days, he told me when he didn't know what to do. What to do next. How to act. All he knew was that he had to keep going. To push past his pain and move forward," she looked at him, "You can't play god."

 _Not even Naruto could be god._

Sakura's voice was bronze like antiques and liquid, like copper, "No one, is invulnerable."

.

.

.

* * *

 **footnote1:** damn, this wasn't supposed to take that long to update. Adjs real life happened and then the holidays and everyone is at my house please I—

 **footnote2:** basically, Sakura is running around. The hospital, training, tactics, and planning the festival. She doesn't really have time to process everything. Shikamaru and Sakura have a friendly, but not best friend type of relationship – mostly because of the war and them seeing each other they're just like, "Heyyyyy." And that type of thing.

 **footnote3:** to all that reviewed, thank you! Those tiny messages make me so happy and encourage me to keep going with wherever this fic is going.

 **footnote4:** also, does anyone else also get "stream of consciousness," or uses them? I can only activate it when I'm super inspired. Or if I have a muse.

 _As always, please review._


	6. equinox

**The Nearest Star**

 **By: WhisperedSilvers**

 **Prompt: "Part of me believes you'll still come back."**

 **Summary: The quest for strength comes from the spirit or in this case, the soul.**

 **X**

* * *

 **equinox**

* * *

"Wake up, Forehead!" Ino's voice rang in collusion with a stream of muffled banging – her fists and they were rapping against her door continuously, "Aren't you, hosting?"

Sakura's brain muddled with the thickness of a dark heavy sleep, stuttered in processing. She blinked hazily, when the words registered in her brain, she groaned deep in her throat and nestled herself back into her blankets, but Ino's voice was like a beacon on the darkest day…or the shrieking of a pelican in the midst of a hurricane, "Go _away_."

Ino's voice shifted to a giggly, obnoxious tenor and she sang, "You're wanted, _Haruno-sama_."

Minato materialized beside her, even he managed to look sleepy, he twisted his face and looked at her, "Are you?"

Sakura buried her face into her pillows, her voice muffled, "No. I quit. I'm staying in my bed and not moving."

Ino snorted against the door, "Unlikely. Get _up_ , we have to greet all the high-rank officials and then Hokage-sama wants to see you."

Sakura grumbled something incoherent into her pillow. She shifted her weight to her knees and arched upwards into a stretch. Huffing, she quickly fell back on her haunches and rubbed her eyes, "Damn it."

Minato groaned and rolled over.

When she stumbled out of bed, eyes half-clear, she grabbed a fresh roll of clothes that she left last night on her chair next to her desk. Things, in a nutshell, became almost mundane. Sakura could barely remember when Minato fell into her or maybe it was the other way around. A month, roughly, if she had to think about it. It was no different than having a conscience, except he had free will—she shook her minutely as she walked into her bathroom. That was something she had to think about _later._

As a spirit – if the term was correct – he wasn't very _nosy_. She had expected probing, the tight, migraine-brewing focus, that made her eyes throb and her temples pulse. Minato was like water, everywhere she didn't want him to be, it wasn't pinpricking scrutiny, it was more of a quiet observation. Unraveling, it thrummed beneath her fingertips, tangled into chakra, and simmered.

She was also going to ignore the fact, that perhaps, Minato fell asleep in her bed.

Tossing her toothbrush into her cup, she splashed some water onto her face and slapped her face to give it some color. Her diplomatic ensemble consisted of black velvet shinobi pants, a deep red, silk, high-neck armless blouse, that cut just beneath her navel, and flowed behind her like a river. Green imprints of leaves stitched on the left side of her top that traveled to the cut of her blouse.

Tying her ambassador armband to her right bicep, she gave her long hair a quick brush – even though Ino would prodding it as soon as she steps foot out of her bathroom – and headed towards the door.

"I'm up," Sakura sighed, "You _better_ have breakfast."

"I got cake and coffee," Ino pulled out an assortment of cakes from a bakery downtown, "I think there are a couple of chocolate tarts too."

"Oh thank _God_ ," she shoved a tart into her mouth and hummed at the bitterness of the cacao. Sugar and caffeine, just what she needed to get through the day.

"Hey," Ino frowned, "Don't mess up your clothes, do you know how _long_ it took me to find that top—silk too? Four days! As much as I love custom clothing," she referred to her blue blouse with green leaf stitching, "Finding tailors this close to the event was cutting it."

"I'll be sure sensei gets the message," Sakura snapped a strawberry off of a sponge cake, "Coffee?"

"With soy milk," the blonde handed her a carton, "Just tell me: _I'm a great friend_."

"You're a great friend, pig," she replied disingenuously and sipped her coffee, "Seriously after you left—I had so much _work_ to do."

"I thought you finished all the preparations—stop moving," Ino's lips twisted, as she brushed Sakura's hair, spraying a wet oil at the ends, "All you had to do was the expense sheet and something else, right?"

She grabbed a blackberry tart that was filled with lemon cream, cracking the shell with her fork, she answered, "I had some reports to fill out. Some for the hospital and then some were for Kakashi-sensei. Tsunade-sama had me go through some things too."

Tugging Sakura's hair into a small bun, Ino pulled a few strands to frame her face, and inquired, "What things?"

 _She's fishing,_ Minato interrupted her brain.

The banter and ease of the conversation is what lulled Sakura into a false sense of security, she twisted her fork into the cream, a deliberate movement that made her seem absentminded, "Some scrolls for a chakra swap — I think I sent you the file on Yuki."

It wasn't exactly a lie.

Ino thought back, "Yeah," she winced, "Sorry, I haven't looked at it. My team is a handful."

Sakura chuckled, "It's fine. How is your team?"

Ino grabbed her plate and placed it back on the counter. Grabbing a powder she swirled the compact with a kabuki brush, "It's going. They kind of remind me of Gai-sensei's team."

Minato winced.

"Oh _no_ ," she gasped into a laugh, "You have a little Lee don't you?"

"Worse—close your eyes, " Ino scowled and grabbed the eyeliner, "A _Neji_."

Sakura giggled, "You have your work cut out for you."

"I swear I'm this close to wringing his neck," she muttered, flicking out the wing, she buffed eyeshadow on her lash line, "Why did they stick me with a Hyuuga anyway?"

"Experience?"

"And what experience is that?"

Sakura rolled her eyes as her blonde bud patted her down with blush and sipped her coffee, "Pretty boys."

Ino paused, her hand hung in mid-air and then she continued to rummage into her bag, "You know, you may be onto something," she ignored her smirk, "Now hush, let me finish."

With Ino's skills, it took a few moments, then she leaned back and smiled in acceptance, "Alright, forehead. Let's go."

—

"Kazekage-sama," Sakura bowed before Gaara and then smiled, "It is a pleasure to have you in the Leaf."

Gaara motioned for the guards to scatter, then he took a seat on the couch and rolled his eyes, "I think you're spending a little too much time in the Hokage Tower, Sakura."

She breathed a laugh, "Honestly, I think I agree with you."

The door opened revealing the other two sand siblings, Kankuro came at her first, "Sakura!" he pulled her into a hug, "How are you doing?"

"Hands off, puppet-boy," Temari snorted and tugged her until she was sitting on the couch next to her, "I apologize for him, Sakura. He's been itching to leave Suna."

Sakura chuckled and Minato materialized next to her. He sat perch on the arm of the couch and glanced at her with surprise. She asked, "Why is that?"

"Because the council is pressuring us to find a suitor," Kankuro grumbled and plopped down next to her, "I have better things to do, you know?"

Emerald eyes stared, "For…you?" then she flickered her gaze over to Gaara, who was scowling and gasped dramatically, " _No_."

Gaara sighed, "Sakura."

"Oh, _c'mon_ ," Sakura laughed at the tone of his voice, "You knew this was going to happen sooner or later."

"I was hoping…for the latter," he said dryly.

"Do you have anyone in mind?" the head-medic asked good-naturedly, her blouse pooling around her like fire, "I could ask around…"

Temari bit the inside of her cheek from laughing, instead, she looked at her pointedly and then raised a brow.

Sakura heard the warning bells before she saw them. Quickly, she snapped that train of conversation before they could delve onto a more personal level. Clearing her throat, she went on, "Anyway—"

 _I didn't realize you were so well sought after, Sakura_ , Minato sounded almost mocking.

"—I came to give you the official schedule for the next three days," Sakura placed the pamphlets on the table, "I will be your representative for the Leaf for the duration of your stay. If you need anything, you know where to find me."

"The hospital?" Kankuro smirked.

"With Naruto?" Temari countered.

Gaara stared blankly at their banter.

"About," Sakura glared half-heartedly, "Or with sensei."

"Hatake still yanking your chain?"

Temari slapped the back of Kankuro's head.

Sakura sighed, "Anyway," she stood up, "I'll see you guys tonight. I assigned a genin team to run your errands or if you need a guide—though, I doubt you guys need one."

"We appreciate the sentiment, Sakura," Gaara nodded his head, "Shizune-san is in the Hokage's office if you would like to see her."

Sakura waved it off, "Maybe later," rolling her shoulders, she walked to the door and gave him a look, "I have a _long_ day."

It took free will to prevent her from jumping out the window, diplomacy took patience and a blank face. The inn, for some reason, felt like a maze, it twisted and it turned. When she found the reception area, nodded at the secretary, slid the door open and inhaled the sunlight—she inhaled deep enough to open the synapses in her brain.

"Well," Minato appeared next to her, he smiled wryly, "That was exciting."

"Your comments are unnecessary," Sakura pointed out with irritation, "Gaara and I go way back."

"The chunin exams, right?"

"Yes," she looked at him strangely, "But how do you—Naruto told you?"

"He didn't have to," Minato answered cryptically, "I find it fascinating that you can talk to him that easily, seeing how he almost killed you."

Then it _clicked._

Sakura demanded, "How much of my memory did you see?"

He winced, his face smoothened, eyebrows knotting in a way that reminded you of Naruto, he replied slowly, "I didn't mean to…when you sleep your subconscious sort of flickers."

"What do you mean?" she frowned.

"It's like a film cartridge, your memories are spun and sometimes they disappear," he continued as they walked down the village path, "Sometimes I hear voices and then other times it's like I'm right there watching."

Sakura's lips thinned.

"It's not like I'm diving into your memory bank," Minato inserted quickly, "I think you would feel that."

To be honest, she's not sure _what_ she would feel.

"Probably," she commented vaguely, "But you still didn't answer the question. How much of my memory did you see?"

"I don't really know," Minato answered honestly, "It's bits and pieces. I remember seeing a cat—Tora I think."

She breathed a laugh, a thrill that clicked against the roof of her mouth and replied, "Oh. _That._ "

Adjustment. In hindsight, it was better for her to accept that Minato had practically leeched onto her like a set of slugs, she was human and there were parts of her life she didn't want _anyone_ to see. That's just how it is. Feeling vulnerable and being it too, it was simply unacceptable.

It got harder to hide things from him, her entire life, her goal was in search of power, in search of strength and part of it, unfortunately, was Sasuke. When she looked back at how far she came, how far she had run, it was almost childish and embarrassing. She partly blamed her mental state – the entirety of Konoha Eleven's mental state as well.

They were _kids_ —adolescents, fighting in a stagnant war.

Sakura had been chasing Sasuke for years and years. Sasuke left on his own accord, he left without a care and part of her, part of her wanted to believe that he left to protect her. In some screwed up, damsel in distress, novel-like intricate part, that he left because he thought, in his own fucked up rhetoric, that, that was his only option.

But Sakura was almost twenty-one now and when she looked back at her own reasonings; she was surprised no one had ever scolded her or confronted her on her own illusions. Some part of her was grateful for Sasuke, because he put her in a position where she had to find herself. However, doesn't it justify her own dreams of wanting Sasuke to come back to the village?

To find the answer to that question, she turned to Hinata. Hinata who grew up within a strict, tightly-knit clan, with an even more rigid upbringing as heir. She grimaced and said, "There were times when I wanted to run away. Neji-nii was the same. A caged bird. We wanted to make our own decisions and live by our own rules, but clans don't work that way. We were trapped. If I had a chance to leave I'd take it," she inhaled deeply here, "I know it's selfish of me, but when had anyone ever asked me what _I_ wanted?"

Sakura, in turn, mulled over their conversation.

Even if they managed to bring Sasuke back, what good would it do, if he was just going to try and leave again?

She had chased Sasuke for years; he was her dream.

Naruto had also chased Sasuke, but to him, it wasn't a dream. His drive was made from desperation and ambition. He had no illusions. It was a goal and it was unacceptable for it to remain a dream because Naruto grew up in a world where the world was against him, he didn't have the time to fancy ideals and planning. He took and he took and he ran.

Sakura was made up of ideals, thoughts, plans, and structure. Where one play fell apart, she had something to fall back on.

She had always been a genjutsu type, but could never truly dispel illusions, it was ironic, given that cognitive thought, analyzing and processing had always been in her strong suit.

Now, she was still the same.

She was still full of plans and ideals, but somewhere along the road, Naruto and Sakura's drives had flipped.

Naruto's head was full of dreams and wonderment because he truly did not understand what it meant to be at a disadvantage to have nothing and create something. She wouldn't be as cruel to say that he didn't understand what pain _was,_ but he didn't know the feeling of insufficiency.

Sakura had to wonder if it was her logic that strengthened or her acceptance, that things will _never_ be the same.

Or maybe, she just grew up.

—

"Sensei," Sakura popped her head in from the door, "Do you think—oh!"

Minato peered into the door above her.

"Mikan-sama," she walked into the room slowly and bowed lowly, "We were not expecting you for another hour."

"Sakura-san," the Daimyo greeted, his black hair tied tightly at the crown of his head, he inclined his head downward in recognition, "Our voyage was quicker than we initially believed it to be."

"All is well," she nodded and smiled politely. Facing the Hokage, she asked, "I assume Sasuke is back as well?"

Kakashi nodded, "At HQ. I can summon if you would like."

Sakura shook her head, "It's fine. I need to go there anyway."

Minato's eyebrows furrowed, _something is strange._

Sakura's jaw eased, _what do you mean?_

 _Kakashi has that look in his eye,_ Minato glanced over to the Daimyo, _the same look where he watched Obito hide beneath a bush of poison ivy and said nothing._

Well, that couldn't be good.

"Unless you needed me for something, Hokage-sama," she waited for a moment. Contrary to belief, Sakura's instincts were on par with Naruto's. She knew she was walking into the trap, but it would be better to walk into one knowingly, then blind.

 _Interesting tactic,_ Minato mused _I can't tell if it's foolish or brave._

Sakura's eyebrow almost twitched, _is there a difference?_

Minato's laugh tickled the back of her eyelids.

"Actually, I was wondering Sakura-chan," Kakashi started and instantly she was wary of the next words that came out of his mouth, "If you would like to show Kisuke-sama the village."

 _I'm going to kill him,_ Sakura's jaw clenched.

She smiled nonetheless and asked, "A tour?"

"If you are not busy, Sakura-san," Kisuke inclined his head politely before smiling, "I'd hate to inconvenience you."

"I have some errands to run actually," Sakura replied diplomatically, "I can take you to the village center and then to your accommodations," she paused before racking her for some more information, "I know from my last mission you have a keen interest in mochi with salt."

The Daimyo approved, "You remembered," he turned his head and gave a curt nod, "I will see you tonight then, Hokage-sama."

And Kakashi smiled all _Kakashi-like_ , which was both unpredictable and alarming all at once.

"Shall we, Mikan-sama?"

"Kisuke please, Sakura-san," Kisuke offered her the crook of his arm and she felt something like a muscle twitch at the back of her neck.

Sakura smiled demurely while Minato leaned against the wall with a quirk of the eyebrow.

 _Idiot,_ and there was no way to tell if she directed that insult at herself, at the Daimyo, at Kakashi, at Minato, or at her life in general. She took the arm of the Fire Daimyo and led him out of the Hokage's Tower.

Diplomacy was like pulling teeth. Sakura had enough experience dealing with political leaders, but that doesn't mean she had to like it. She had the privilege of meeting the Fire Daimyo three years ago, she was summoned to the Great Hall to heal his daughter who had been suffering from chronic mercury poisoning. One part of the picture, when it comes to healing people – a civilian in this case – was the healing itself, but the main issue lay in finding the source of the problem.

 _If you can find the source, you can stop the symptoms from breaching,_ Sakura thought.

 _And if you can't find it?_ Minato prodded.

She frowned.

"Is something the matter, Sakura-san?" The Daimyo asked when he noticed her change in mood.

"Nothing," she shook her head, "Just wondering how long Kakashi—er, Hokage-sama," she corrected, "Will take at the meeting."

"With the security procedures," he filled in.

"Yes," Sakura answered automatically and then blinked, "How did you know—"

"I am fairly versed in these types of matters," Kisuke-sama's eyes twinkled and he finished dryly, "Parties."

She chuckled, "I'd say so."

After a few moments of enjoying the silence, Sakura directed him towards a stall that the Inuzuka clan held. She waved at Hana from inside the stall, "Hana-san, how are you doing?"

"Sakura-san," she tilted her head in greeting, a smile breaking into her face and she replied impishly, "We opened about an hour ago. The foreigners have yet to breach this side of the village. Though," she grinned, "The ronin have made their interest known."

Minato coughed politely in the back of her head, she felt the vibrations in her fingers.

Sakura smiled thinly and presented, "Hana-san, I'd like to introduce you to the Fire Daimyo."

Hana's eyes widened before she gave a quick bow and greeted, "Mikan-sama, I didn't realize you would be attending the festival."

Kisuke's lips twisted wryly, "Uchiha-san had extended the invitation, and I so graciously accepted."

Sakura could hear the irritation brewing in the back of his throat, so she tossed in a segue way, "Mikan-sama has a particular interest in mochi with soy sauce. I know the Inuzuka clan has probably the best brews—"

"Yes," Hana nodded furiously before grabbing a box from the back of her stall, tossed in some extra nori and a small tub of soy sauce, "The Inuzuka clan has had distilleries for years, we ferment mostly soy sauce and rice wine."

Sakura grabbed a pair of chopsticks next to the window and handed it to the Daimyo. There was an irrational surge of jealousy as she watched the Daimyo wrap the rice cake in a strip of nori and dip it into the soy sauce. It was the scene itself that reminded Sakura of those old fairytales that her mother used to tell her when she had a nightmare and couldn't go back to sleep.

Artistic and untouchable.

"Would you like a rice-cake, Sakura-san?" Mikan-sama inquired holding a piece of rice-cake in between his chopsticks.

Sakura almost blanched, "Ah, no thank you, Mikan-sama. I ate just before I visited."

"Kisuke, Sakura-san," The Daimyo chided gently.

Hana's eyebrows raised.

"Force of habit," she smiled politely.

 _The last time I saw Mikan-sama, he was a child,_ Minato decided to speak. _He was always outspoken and serious._

 _Is there a point to this conversation?_ Sakura almost raised a brow.

Minato rolled his eyes and Sakura's palm itched.

 _He trusts you_ , he said.

 _I did save his daughter,_ Sakura pointed out, _It's not a big deal._

Minato sighed, _Sakura you just bought yourself an ally._

 _I didn't buy anything,_ she argued, _If anything, I bought loyalty._

"Would you like another box, Mi—Kisuke-sama?" Sakura asked after a few moments.

"Yes," Mikan-sama nodded, "My daughter also, has an interest in these."

Sakura nodded.

 _Like pulling teeth,_ Minato stated amusedly.

—

"Well, that was interesting," Sakura sighed, she took a break underneath the big oak tree in training ground seven. She sipped her iced tea and rolled her shoulders.

Minato took a seat next to her, his Hokage robe – since when did have his Hokage robe? – blossomed around his hips and legs, and he asked, "Was it really?"

"I've only met the Daimyo on two missions," she admitted, "Once when his daughter was sick and the other was a diplomatic mission. I had to represent the civilian district."

"As a shinobi?"

"The Haruno clan aren't a shinobi clan," Sakura explained, "Only my parents and a few, very distant relatives have joined the ranks. I just happen to be placed on a team…with very powerful people."

"You do realize, you, are a powerful shinobi," Minato pointed out.

She shrugged, "Semantics."

He scowled, " _Sakura_."

"Yes, yes don't do the whole _woe-is-me_ and self-pitying act," Sakura waved it off and sipped her tea, "Can't help it, the bitter teen in me likes to make her appearance every once in a while."

Minato sighed exasperatedly, "We're going to have to work on that."

"My self-esteem issues or my lack of skills?" Sakura's lips quirked with amusement.

He shot her a dirty look.

"It's not like I'm hiding it," she retorted, flicking a few wayward strands from her face, she continued, "It's basic knowledge that I'm a medic. Compared to my idiotic teammates, I'm just that girl who got lucky enough to make it past the Sannin mark."

"You call that _luck_?" Minato inquired with minute disbelief, "Sakura," he emphasized with a wave of his hand, "Self-made shinobi."

"Like you?"

"Yes," he stated bluntly, "I wasn't born into a ninja clan and I don't have any type of kekkai genkai, yet, somehow I still managed to become the Yondaime – as short as my reign was – and it had nothing to do with _luck_."

Sakura stared at him with surprise.

"I worked hard, I studied even harder and I had a knack for coming up with complicated jutsu. I spent hours in the library learning the Second's jutsu, rewriting ninjutsu equations and learning to pick apart Whirlpool documents just so I had a better idea for fūinjutsu. I had to remain determined, acquire patience, perception and sometimes, I had to seek out advice," Minato said passionately, "Luck doesn't equate to talent, nor does birth."

She had to say something, it felt like mortification mixed with something uncomfortable, "Minato—"

"It upsets me when you say things like that, Sakura," he pressed his lips together and continued, "I realize part of the blame falls on me. I should've taught Kakashi better, because he shouldn't have neglected you like that."

Sakura couldn't come up with a quip that would somehow soften his polite scolding. Yes, Minato was right. Yes, luck doesn't equate to skill, but at the same time it was hard to stop thinking that she was second best. She spent years—years trying to catch up with her teammates, trying to find _some_ equal ground, but it always seemed like it wasn't enough.

"Plus," Minato added in when she didn't speak, "When you become the _Pink Flash_ , well, you'll have a _flee on sight_ mark in the Bingo Book."

She sputtered, " _Pink Flash?"_ she blinked green eyes and shook her head, "I've had the _flee on sight_ mark since I was fifteen."

He blinked, "What?"

"When I was fifteen I killed Sasori of the Red Sand," Sakura told him and furrowed her brows, "You know the Akatsuki? I thought Naruto told you or—it was explained to you during the war."

"You were fifteen?"

She nodded.

Minato laughed, "Sakura, I didn't enter the books until I was eighteen. I certainly didn't receive the _flee on sight_ warning until I was twenty, and by then I was already Hokage."

"Oh," Sakura chuckled hesitantly.

 _Awkward._

—

"I hate coming here," Sakura sighed, pushing past the kunai-proof tower, she headed into the Jounin HQ and walked past the lobby.

 _Why?_ Minato wondered, _It's where all the Jounin are—weren't most of them in your graduating class?_

 _Yep,_ Sakura confirmed, _I just hate coming here because everyone is a little too—_

"Sakura-san!" Rock Lee appeared in front of her, teeth shinier than the metal flint Sai kept in his shinobi packs, "You look mighty youthful today!"

— _much._

Sakura greeted him tiredly, "Hi Lee. I thought you would be in the village."

"I was just about to leave!" He grinned, "Gai-sensei has been giving me extra training! We're almost up to five thousand push-ups in under five hours."

"Lee that is not healthy," Sakura scolded him, "You will end up hurting your liver and ripping your muscles. Your kidneys can only handle so much."

"Not to worry, dear flower!" Lee nodded, "I shall take breaks in between and drink…lots of water?"

Sakura glared at him.

"And rest every other day?"

She sighed, "Better."

 _Youthful,_ The word left Minato's mouth like sand, _He carries a torch for you?_

It was a statement, not a question.

 _Since we were twelve._

Minato's laugh tickled the back of her eyes.

"What are you doing here, Sakura-san?" Lee asked curiously, "I thought you would be at the hospital."

She raised a brow at his sudden question.

He laughed nervously at the tick in her brow, "I-I just meant, you rarely come to HQ! It is an honor and a blessing for you to grace—"

"It's fine Lee," Sakura waved off his apology, "I'm just looking for my teammates."

"Sasuke-san and Sai-san are on the third floor," Lee said suddenly, "Would you like me to escort you?"

"No, it's fine," Sakura paused, "Wait, Sai and Sasuke are there together?" she stared at him with disbelief, " _Alone?"_

"Is that a bad thing?" Lee questioned hesitantly.

 _No, but it could end in Sasuke Kirin-ing the hell out of Sai,_ Sakura thought exasperatedly, she yanked the wayward strands of hair resting at the back of her neck in contemplation.

 _They got along that bad?_ Minato frowned.

 _Sai was Sasuke's replacement,_ she explained and said a quick goodbye to Lee, _Sai came from Root so his human association skills are not the best, they're better now, but there's always that animosity between those two._

Sakura used shunshin to reach the third floor in record timing.

 _Make sure to put a seal on the building before you leave,_ Minato advised.

 _I've barely gotten down the basics of Hiraishin and you want to me to put a mark on the building?_

Sakura opened the door to the recovery room. Sai sat next to the window, painting – she tried to peek from her peripheral vision – something. Sasuke sat on the sofa, sharpening a kunai with a twitch in his brow.

"Hey," she greeted casually.

 _Casual?_ Minato snickered.

 _Shut up,_ she hissed.

"Sakura," Sasuke looked up briefly before looking back at his kunai.

"Ugly," Sai greeted, "What are you doing here?"

"I came to give you, your duties," she answered slowly. Considering the time constraint she was under, she decided it was better to go the cleaner route than to go around the bend, "Sai, how do you feel about drawing nin and civilians for the festival? They'll pay you, of course."

"Pay me to draw?"

"Yes," she nodded, "I told the council that you're art is quite beautiful, they're willing to give you a booth near the Hokage Tower so you can draw now and tonight," then she smirked, "Ino will be waiting."

His eyes widened.

"That's right," Sakura sniffed, "Now up to it. She's waiting in Shikamaru's office."

 _Sneaky Sakura,_ Minato chuckled.

Once Sai was out of the fray, Sakura turned to look at Sasuke and she said, "You're on security rotation."

He raised his brows, "With who?"

"Kiba," she answered, "Lee will be joining you after midnight."

"The council doesn't want me in the village?" Sasuke smirked.

"No one wants you in the village," Sakura stated bluntly, "They don't trust you. Which is why I'm keeping you away from the masses."

"You mean you don't trust me," he pressed, dark brows furrowed but he waited nonetheless.

Minato stood behind her, a silent pillar of strength, but it was a reminder. A reminder that she wasn't alone and if she were honest, she wasn't sure if it was a comfort or a punishment.

She straightened her shoulders and leveled with him, "Yes."

Chakra saturated the air, heavy in her breath and form. Sakura didn't move. She pinned him with green eyes, defiance tightening in her jaw and lips, "I don't trust you. The village doesn't trust you. The civilians don't trust you. You would be a walking hazard if I let you into the festival unsupervised, where hundreds of foreign nin, civilians, political leaders and ambassadors are loitering around. If they don't know you by name, they know you by _sight._ "

"I wondered when you would come clean with me," Sasuke said with feigned nonchalance.

"Clean? Sasuke, I'm telling you the truth because I have no advantage in keeping it to myself," Sakura told him, "Moreover, after your rotations, you will be shadowing Kakashi-sensei when he goes into the summit."

"We're having a summit?"

"Essential shinobi and high-ranking political leaders are invited," she answered, "Tomorrow."

"Hn. So I have to attend?"

"I said you're _shadowing_ ," she emphasized, "You're not allowed in."

Sasuke frowned, "How am I supposed to shadow if I'm not allowed in the room?"

"Figure it out," Sakura shrugged and made way to the door.

"Are you allowed in the room?" Sasuke's haughty voice forced her to turn her head.

Minato's thumb and index finger squeezed the pressure points at the back of her necks, tension falling off her shoulders like running water.

Sakura quirked a brow, emerald orbs glinted like silver and cobalt, and she used her thumb to indicate her person, " _Essential_ shinobi, Sasuke."

Minato's exhale washed the back of her neck in warm, steady waves.

* * *

 **footnote1:** Surprise, it is I, Sonia, who cannot tear myself from this fandom no matter how hard I try.

 **footnote2:** There are things I want to say, but cannot remember now that I've come to the end of this chapter.

 **footnote3:** Happy Birthday Sakura.

 **footnote4:** Also, thank you so much to everyone who reviewed. Just know that I read all these notes, and tiny messages when I'm feeling down & uninspired.

 _As always, please drop a review on your way out._


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